Anonycock
Doha, Qatar
Today, I'm so sexually deprived, I got a boner from undressing a mannequin at work. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
imaginationdarling
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Phoenix, United States
Comforting
Today, I was at my retail job and we had to change the mannequin's outfit. I had to hold her while my manager grabbed the new outfit. I rested my head on her naked plastic chest, and it was the closest I've got to affection in years. FML
Anonymous
Perv'
Today, someone tried to rob my boss's store and I had a knife held to my neck. That’s not the FML. The FML is that, for some reason, it excited me and I got a boner. The thief told me I was all kinds of messed up and left without stealing anything. My god, I’m some kind of freak. FML
ohcrap
United States
Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML
xsnqw
San Francisco, United States
Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML
Thanks dicks
Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML
Creepster
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United States
Hey good lookin'
Today, I almost crashed my car because I was checking out an Old Navy mannequin wearing a bra. FML
AlexK
United Kingdom
Today, I was browsing my computer to find naked pictures of my ex-girlfriend. I decided it'd be funny to photoshop a penis onto one of the pictures. I'm straight and the new picture turned me on more than before. FML
SoMuchForThatIdea
This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
What could've been
Today, I got to spend the entire day shopping for lingerie with the man of my dreams. He bought everything I'd ever wanted and more! Too bad it was for another woman. FML
FML
United States
Today, I came to work ready to impress my boss. A couple of weeks ago I asked him for a promotion from stock to sales and I have been proving myself worthy. Turns out he hired a new girl for sales, with great, big, fake breasts. FML
aXel
Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML
Top comments
joeyl2008 29
You need hookers. lots of hookers
Tripartita 45
It doesn't matter what you do OP, they will NEVER love you the way you love them! Trust me… On an unrelated note, I'd advise you to look up the word "agalmatophilia".
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Comments (58)
simleader 13
That's a HARD thing to deal with.
davincidasecond 24
No.
cheeeksss 29
It would've worked a little better if you didn't CAPITALIZE the word.
HonestPie 10
Apparently your pun is not better than all the other million puns done in this site. Go figure.
xx000o 27
Well at least you know it works.
joeyl2008 29
You need hookers. lots of hookers
sammiaaron 16
don't we all
skycollapsed 5
dudes from Qatar.
TripleDallas123 15
Buy 2 Hookers, get 5 STDs for free!
tin_cup 27
And protection!
Tripartita 45
It doesn't matter what you do OP, they will NEVER love you the way you love them! Trust me… On an unrelated note, I'd advise you to look up the word "agalmatophilia".
andrmac 25
At least it will never tell him no. All he has to do it buys her cloths no arguments no on the rag.
mds9986 24
For the lazy: Agalmatophilia (from the Greek agalma 'statue', and -philia φιλία = love) is a paraphilia involving sexual attraction to a statue, doll, mannequin or other similar figurative object. The attraction may include a desire for actual sexual contact with the object, a fantasy of having sexual (or non-sexual) encounters with an animate or inanimate instance of the preferred object, the act of watching encounters between such objects, or sexual pleasure gained from thoughts of being transformed or transforming another into the preferred object. Agalmatophilia may also encompass Pygmalionism (from the myth of Pygmalion), which denotes love for an object of one's own creation.[1]
tintarroja 31
Maybe you have a new fetish...
KingKA14 11
Two things are now up straight
HrothgarXII 21
I'm sure the mannequin loves you too OP.
Halfass 8
There's nothing wrong with that, OP. Be worried if the mannequin also got a boner when you undressed it.
hipposteve 21
Palmela Handerson?
colder13 10
bad hipposteve. not even creative.
TheNewGuy03 29
You should truly be worried if these mannequins you are undressing turn out like the Autons from Doctor Who.
dramaelf 37
Damn! You beat me to it!
sammiaaron 16
he beat himself to it
Rainbow_Rhinos 23
#30 I laughed at this
TheNewGuy03 29
Well played, 30. *virtual high-five*
DarwinFailsAgain 7
Was he hot? ?
freddygasman 18
There are female mannequins as well.
mariri9206 32
based on what 41 said, petition to change calling them "female mannequins" to "womannequins."