Today, these kids in my math class told me to ask this girl if I could lick her clit. I basically yelled, "What's a clit?" Everyone looked at me. I'm a senior in high school, no one has yet to explain it to me. I had to Google it when I got home. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML
Today, I asked my college chemistry teacher for some much-needed help. Instead of explaining anything to me, she scoffed that if I don't understand something, I should "just Google it." FML
Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML
Today, my professor asked me a question in class. Thinking it was a rhetorical question, I shrugged and said, "Google it." It wasn't. He stared at me in silence for the longest 10 seconds of my life. FML
Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML
Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML
Today, in the heat of losing our virginity, I asked him to “suck my clit, suck my clit, oh god please suck my clit.” He stopped what he was doing and asked me, “What’s a clit?” I almost strangled him. Don’t date boys homeschooled by single mamas, they’ll break your heart. FML
Today, I was teaching a high school calculus class. I wrote a complex formula on the board. As I wrote, students asked if they could take a picture of the board and circulate it. I said yes, and I was pleased as everybody seemed to be taking pictures. Soon, I realized why: my skirt was tucked into my underwear. Within a few minutes, every student in the school had an email with a picture of my ugliest pair of floral-printed panties. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML
Today, as I was at work as a gynecologist, a twelve-year-old girl asked me, on a scale of 1-10, how tight her "fun stuff" was. This is the new generation. FML
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Top comments
skatingweasel 0
Dude...you need to get laid.
Hannah_fml 0
talk about sheltered
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Comments (191)
Eryx_fml 3
Wow getting to Senior High without knowing what that is... Really sad. :/ Your "friends" were probably mocking you lol
superson_fml 0
Dude! Sheltered life! It's ok I had to explain to my friend in 8th grade that girls don't give birth from their belly buttons and pee out their butts.
fastpepper 0
DUDE i did the same thing but it was twat instead of clit
chillout_fml 0
should know what that is in at least gr. 7... and if not than did your parents not let you go to sex ed class... i mean come on man
YouDontSeeMe 0
I'm reminded of a britney spears quote. "If nobody told you in your whole life how are you supposed to know"
Jali_Malcolm 0
Dan Marino you ain't. That guys been laid more than a few times.
jguarin 0
lol you fail i think you will remain a virgin till youre 50
AlisonMarie 0
Okay, that's kinda sad. However, everybody that commented telling this kid to watch **** is ignorant as hell. Also, everybody associating obsessive morals and thinking reproductive organs are evil is "religious" than you are out of your head. Anybody that is religious believes that God made SEX. and made it to be beautiful. But anyway. Stop harrassing this kid.
Mars68 0
Don't feel bad. I'm a girl and I had never even heard of it till my freshman year of college--last semester. XD
kittykat77 0
Good job not being a total pervert! You win. Sex is way overrated, so I've been told. Yelling any word you don't know is a bad idea though. You should have gotten mad at your friends for being such creeps. They shouldn't bother random girls!