Today, these kids in my math class told me to ask this girl if I could lick her clit. I basically yelled, "What's a clit?" Everyone looked at me. I'm a senior in high school, no one has yet to explain it to me. I had to Google it when I got home. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML
Today, I asked my college chemistry teacher for some much-needed help. Instead of explaining anything to me, she scoffed that if I don't understand something, I should "just Google it." FML
Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML
Today, my professor asked me a question in class. Thinking it was a rhetorical question, I shrugged and said, "Google it." It wasn't. He stared at me in silence for the longest 10 seconds of my life. FML
Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML
Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML
Today, in the heat of losing our virginity, I asked him to “suck my clit, suck my clit, oh god please suck my clit.” He stopped what he was doing and asked me, “What’s a clit?” I almost strangled him. Don’t date boys homeschooled by single mamas, they’ll break your heart. FML
Today, I was teaching a high school calculus class. I wrote a complex formula on the board. As I wrote, students asked if they could take a picture of the board and circulate it. I said yes, and I was pleased as everybody seemed to be taking pictures. Soon, I realized why: my skirt was tucked into my underwear. Within a few minutes, every student in the school had an email with a picture of my ugliest pair of floral-printed panties. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML
Today, as I was at work as a gynecologist, a twelve-year-old girl asked me, on a scale of 1-10, how tight her "fun stuff" was. This is the new generation. FML
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Top comments
skatingweasel 0
Dude...you need to get laid.
Hannah_fml 0
talk about sheltered
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Comments (191)
skatingweasel 0
Dude...you need to get laid.
frosting1012 0
that'd the ugliest foti I've ever seen of a gyuy before
hawxfighter_fml 0
dude u don't even got a ****** photo
brianjman14 23
#167 1. You don't even have a photo, so don't try to insult people when you don't even show yourself. 2. Go back to school if that's how you really spell "that's," "photo," and "guy." OP, all I can say is....... Wow. You REALLY need to learn this type of stuff ESPECIALLY if you're a SENIOR.
Classic_PWN 1
I think it's a cute pic..but that's just me.
CoGhostRider 31
Lots of guys get laid without knowing what a clit is and Half the guys commenting here probably can't even find it.
Mnemic 6
Doing some research ain't that bad sometimes... ;)
JessieMongoose 11
LOL.
Hannah_fml 0
talk about sheltered
Enoch134 0
rofl shelter kids are the biggest sex peeved out their Hannah
justindrew14 29
I didn't know what **** was until one of my friends showed me retube.
Tehalon 0
Sad, very sad. Unless you have no interest in women what so ever then its oke.
jayfx 0
dude....wow
Rollercoaster_fml 0
Dude... start by watching some ****... maybe even reading up on anatomy...! And then do what #1 said.
Yogirl1223 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
you must be either very socially retarded or very ugly. my advice: watch some ****
Parky03 9
Why do you want OP to be like you...?
jSOPURE 3
Ahh, innocence. :)
hollyperk716 0
awh... ha ha once my mom and some family friends were eating lunch at a nice restaurant after church, all of the sudden my sister goes " what's ***********?" and my mom goes " WHERE DID YOU HEAR THAT?!" and she says "(25 year old freak) Steven just texted me that he was giving me that for my 16th birthday, what does it mean?" and my friend goes "it means he wants to eat you out" and the people at the table next to us stood up, children in tow, and moved tables. people need to learn these things. pick up a book. something.
thetr00per 0
that family had children...
Gondile 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Did we really need your ******* life story?
originaljosh 11
did your parents **** up this "steven" guy?
myname_fml 0
LOL @ 9 Your sister should not be getting that from a 25 year old guy, esp if she doesn't even know what it means.
spazz666 18
10) Instead of commenting on the FML, you might wanna try hitting the "reply" button.