Today, my hubby asked for a morning blow job, and I happily obliged. All was going great until he came and farted at the same time. I laughed and reassured him it was no big deal. He cried. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as my husband normally initiates sex and sometimes I want to but always chicken out, I was feeling brave and did so. After he came, he continued working on me and I farted. I embarrassingly apologized and he said it was ok and kept going. I then continued to fart, and I had to stop. FML
Today, my hubby thought he made me queef during sex. I was too embarrassed ro tell him it was a fart I was holding in, but couldn’t once I orgsmed. FML
Today, after asking my hubby for what seems the millionth time to stop shoving his finger into my bum crack, I thought it would be funny to give him a taste of his own medicine by doing it to him. Right as my finger was in his crack, he let loose a huge fart. FML
Today, my husband farted, grabbed a fan and blew the smell right at me. Disgusted, I reminded him that I’m a lady, not a dude. He burst out laughing and sang, "Dude looks like a lady." FML
Today, right before my hubby got home and walked into the bedroom, I farted. The smell was so bad that he thought he'd stepped in shit and to looked at the bottom of his shoes for dog poop. I laughed so hard, but with a horrified look he asked, "How"? He says I've got to see a doctor. FML
Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML
Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Pitbull305 9
Those are tears of elation. He just experienced a magical moment.
kingoirish 4
best wife ever
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (126)
mimiminx 23
Blow and go!
rott3n 6
Tears of joy.
ryanhope22 10
yeah next time ignor it
Revan501 15
Ignore*
MNBOY16 15
Every man's dream! A woman that was happy to do it!
jeniferleet 7
Thats awesome! Yay for you not making him feel worse. Poor guy. So embarrassed.
perdix 31
You are lying. It is a big deal, because now you have to either (ee) split up or take that one-way train to Blumpkinville. He was crying because Blumpkinville is a horrible place to live -- you're happy when you are there, but you are cut off from the rest of the world.
whostolemylama 12
You tried too hard, Perdix.
perdix 31
#31, nah, that didn't take much effort at all.
tonijulie 20
Agreed!
beddington 7
I thought this was going to end with OP laughing, and OP's husband's load coming out her nose. THAT IS A FML!!
mtlfenix 7
Bright side: at least it wasn't a 69 with him on top and a shart instead of a fart ... You're a good wife OP
darth_luke 8
Awwe..
Jirekianu2 19
Most guys are pretty sexually insecure. So laughing in bed can be construed as something really hurtful. But... I would've laughed too.