Today, my husband farted, grabbed a fan and blew the smell right at me. Disgusted, I reminded him that I’m a lady, not a dude. He burst out laughing and sang, "Dude looks like a lady." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while sitting on the couch with my husband, I farted quietly. Not a big deal, except it's hot out and our fan was blowing in his face, and it stunk. FML
Today, right before my hubby got home and walked into the bedroom, I farted. The smell was so bad that he thought he'd stepped in shit and to looked at the bottom of his shoes for dog poop. I laughed so hard, but with a horrified look he asked, "How"? He says I've got to see a doctor. FML
Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML
Today, my husband left our bedroom to go turn the thermostat down in the hall. I let out the smelliest fart, so bad that I had to blame it on our baby. He laughed and said, "I leave for one second and come back and it smells like a sewer in here." FML
Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML
Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML
Today, after asking my hubby for what seems the millionth time to stop shoving his finger into my bum crack, I thought it would be funny to give him a taste of his own medicine by doing it to him. Right as my finger was in his crack, he let loose a huge fart. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my husband farted while he was naked and bending over to pick up his clothes, so me lying on the bed got a perfect view of his butthole twitching and flapping around as the gas escaped. Who says romance is dead? FML
Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML
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Top comments
sigurd 11
You should be able to handle someones farts and take it as a joke when you are married with them. Return the favor :)
SirTalkaton 22
It's not true love until you can fart in front of them. Sounds like you guys are golden
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Comments (89)
sigurd 11
You should be able to handle someones farts and take it as a joke when you are married with them. Return the favor :)
lp5252 4
he's a mother father gentlemen
woosah 16
I agree with that, but I feel like he didn't need to grab a fan a blow it at her. The stench would have reached her soon enough!
ryan112 12
I find this funny. Lol! All the above.
Angeuh_fml 21
What ? But women are Princesses : we don't pee, poop or fart ! ;) Instead we're making rainbows <3
sigurd 11
#11, but then she would have time to escape!
FweakofCydonia 40
Seriously #24, a PSY reference?
baseballdude1283 18
That's a successful marriage right there
chabelo 10
yeah confidence and jokes that's pretty much a good marriage
avapaige1234 19
Why are some people so illiterate with sarcasm?
avapaige1234 19
Why are some people so illiterate with sarcasm?
cmayer 20
Sounds like you married a good man.
woosah 16
What a gentlemen.
SirTalkaton 22
It's not true love until you can fart in front of them. Sounds like you guys are golden
SpamPam 18
Would that be a different story if OP farted? I just hope Op's spouse is prepared for retaliation.
flashback.miss 28
Aww come on, learn to laugh a little :) Should've sang along with him :D
UnidentifiedFun 37
At least he was joking, and didn't change the words to,"Lady looks like a dude."
ironichalibut 24
"dude looks like.. He won't have a lady much longer"
Ceejay1 13
He is disrespectful & nasty.
Mossears133 15
He is freaking awesome!
mmizbbz210 13
its a joke. i dont understand how people can not take one...
Harpy20 24
My husband likes to do it after he eats cheese. I feel like I'm suffocating. Sounds like a great relationship to me :)