Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said, "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML
Today, my parents heard me leaving my room at 2 am, and freaked out because they thought I was sneaking out. I was too embarrassed to tell them that I was getting food instead of having a social life. FML
Today, my boyfriend sneaked into my room, not knowing I wasn't home. It would have been great, except my dad went in my room to put laundry away. FML
Today, I told my dad I couldn't make the trip to see him this weekend because I had to work. I surprised him by driving ten hours, and while he was out, I let myself in with my key and hid behind the couch for when he came in. He walked in. I jumped out. I then had to call 911. FML
Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML
Today, I tried to sneakily leave my boyfriend's house at 3 a.m. without his parents knowing. I had a flat tire. FML
Today, I was trying to sneak home from a party. Instead, I head-butted a glass door and woke my mother up. FML
Today, I found out my son has been sneaking out of his room at night to see his girlfriend. He's a fully-grown 23-year-old man with a job and his own car. He doesn't need to sneak out. What an idiot. FML
Today, I received a very expensive bottle of wine for Christmas. My alcoholic mother snuck into my house while I was out and drank the whole bottle. FML
Today, I got up at 2 AM to grab a snack. I quietly crept down the stairs, only to find my dad, mom, and a couple of their friends having a secret poker game. Now they think I have a sleepwalking problem. FML
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Top comments
be_happy1 0
Wow that sucks, you should definitely tell your mom.
samusfox 0
Blackmail him...
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Comments (280)
the_holy_one 0
although this sucks, its quite perfect u can blackmail him, he'll do anything xD
Gringo_fml 0
that is ****** up don't listen to these sick bitches, i caught my dad cheating on my mum and i regret not telling her... Tell her now you'll be better off -_-
ChelseaChops 1
Finally! Something original. FYL. Still, I'd blackmail **** out of him.
Sucks2beYouxD 0
You tell ya mum that you spied on your dad, not sneaking out xD
milyfesuckz2 0
if she tells her mom then shes going to be in the middle of it, and her father will deny it and her mother might not believe her. Use this info to your advantage, ytour in control of ur house now. black mail like a mother ******. then maybe try and find out ur dads schedule that he goes to that other womans house and u and ur mom can go on a little night ride to find daddy being a SCUMBAG.
srslyfmlifeee 0
^^^ Good idea. That sucks tbh.
SarlaccBits 0
Owch. That one really sucks. and #205 makes very good points.
AlienMind 0
Sorry, but your dad's a POS for doing that.
dancing_bear 0
He seriously thinks that sneaking out of the house is equivilant to cheating so the two of you can make some sort of deal over it? Honestly, tell your mother, because when she finds out (at some point she will), if she also realises you knew and didn't tell her, she'll be angry with you, too. And as someone else said, if she's just found out her husband's having an affair, I highly doubt punishing you for sneaking out will be the first thing on her mind.
AlfonzoRex 0
She deserves a right to know.