Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said, "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML
Today, my parents heard me leaving my room at 2 am, and freaked out because they thought I was sneaking out. I was too embarrassed to tell them that I was getting food instead of having a social life. FML
Today, my boyfriend sneaked into my room, not knowing I wasn't home. It would have been great, except my dad went in my room to put laundry away. FML
Today, I told my dad I couldn't make the trip to see him this weekend because I had to work. I surprised him by driving ten hours, and while he was out, I let myself in with my key and hid behind the couch for when he came in. He walked in. I jumped out. I then had to call 911. FML
Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML
Today, I tried to sneakily leave my boyfriend's house at 3 a.m. without his parents knowing. I had a flat tire. FML
Today, I was trying to sneak home from a party. Instead, I head-butted a glass door and woke my mother up. FML
Today, I found out my son has been sneaking out of his room at night to see his girlfriend. He's a fully-grown 23-year-old man with a job and his own car. He doesn't need to sneak out. What an idiot. FML
Today, I received a very expensive bottle of wine for Christmas. My alcoholic mother snuck into my house while I was out and drank the whole bottle. FML
Today, I got up at 2 AM to grab a snack. I quietly crept down the stairs, only to find my dad, mom, and a couple of their friends having a secret poker game. Now they think I have a sleepwalking problem. FML
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Top comments
be_happy1 0
Wow that sucks, you should definitely tell your mom.
samusfox 0
Blackmail him...
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Comments (280)
deathproof_fml 0
Damn that really sucks...you should tell her anyways.
acro_actress95 0
I would still tell my mom. She'd owe it to me not to ground me after I told her. LOL. That suck though. But seriously TELL HER!!!
lifewithsarah 0
DO NOT BLACKMAIL! are you crazy! that's such a bitch thing to do! just because he's a dick you don't have to be one too... just do the right thing and tell your mom.
donner1423 0
Just tell her.
24788 7
You're really ****** on this one. FYL
Hermyoni 0
#153 Not everyone does it and you know plenty of people cheat on spouses they love and care for. But they want the sex with someone else. They don't want the spouse to find out because they love them as twisted as that sounds. Regardless they should tell the mom because no parent should make his kid lie because he couldn't keep it in his pants.
andjew123 0
okay dude you should definately read this... if you want to tell your mom then thats cool too but heres wat you should do. talk to him bout it. find out the extent of the relationship. if its serious enough then tell her. but if he is going to end it then you could use it to your advantage. and not only would it work out for you but you would probably have a much better relationship with your father. so its a win win situation.
Illustrator 0
I'm pretty sure your dad kicks major amounts of ass.
Wm2oo9 0
Have you ever considered his gf could be your real mom?
ilovefmlife 0
like father like daughter.