Today, I accidentally walked in on my roommate while she was changing clothes. She insisted on telling her boyfriend what had happened, because, "It wouldn't feel right" if she didn't. Her boyfriend is a MMA fighter/bodybuilder and has major jealousy issues. I'm screwed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my roommate came home and began changing clothes in the same room that my boyfriend and I were in. I quickly got annoyed and angry and when I began questioning her about it she just laughed while saying, "Oh relax, it's not like he's never seen me naked before." FML
Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend changing. She responded by screaming, throwing herself on the ground to avoid me seeing her, and crawling into the bathroom. We've been living together for two months. FML
Today, I came home and heard a noise in the bathroom. I figured it was my girlfriend, so I went over and as the door closed, I told her not to close it because I'd seen her beautiful body before. Turns out it was our roommate. FML
Today, I came home and heard a noise in the bathroom. I figured it was my girlfriend, so I went over and as the door closed, I told her not to close the door as I've seen her beautiful body before. Turns out it was our roommate. FML
Today, my roommate's boyfriend professed his love to me. I kicked him out, and he stood outside the door calling my name until he saw my roommate coming down the hall. They both came in and he acted like nothing happened. FML
Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment for the first time, only to see another girl walking out. I accused her of cheating with him and we got into a fight. Turns out I was at the wrong apartment. He lives next door. FML
Today, I was chilling at home when my roomie cruised in with a baddie on his arm. She turned out to be a total ho and started trying to get in my pants while he was sitting RIGHT THERE. I did everything I could to shake her off and in the end I just asked her to leave. Fuck, I feel bad for him. FML
Today, I got into a fight with my roommate's girlfriend's best friend. A few hours later, they had me evicted. FML
Today, I found out that my new roommate is dating my ex-boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
amerwin 3
If you can't outrun him, tell him your gay.
alaaloo_fml_fml 0
Your roommate sounds like she is just looking for an excuse to start some drama.... or to see you physically hurt.
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Comments (218)
JCA 0
Yes you are screwed...run very fast
pottymouthpanda 0
shouldve pretended u was blind :)
lareske 0
Go for either the eye's, throat or nuts. Strike first, fast and hard and make sure your final blow is knock out and you will be right. That or get smashed lol. good luck.
futureARMYman 0
there is this new invention called knocking maybe u should try it
FuckMyEveryth1ng 0
It's his roomate, as in it's his place, too. He shouldn't have to knock in his own place.
Fragmonto 5
hide your kids, hide your wife!!!
salsalover_12 5
OP while you're getting beaten up do you think you could record it and then while you're int he hospital possibly upload it on youtube?
chetchatter 5
run like hell...
salsalover_12 5
after he finds out he'll probably have dumbells with your name on them OP you should be honored you'll be the whole reason for a more intensive workout! :D
Acousticpixie14 6
She's just trying to start crap. Tell her bf before she does...makes you look like a good guy trying to do the right thing.
SleazeDisease_fml 0
Well she sounds reasonable :p ... That seems like a lose/lose situation to me. Telling her boyfriend isn't going to do anything but feed his jealousy and trust issues.