Today, my boyfriend suddenly stopped in the middle of sex, just as I was actually starting to enjoy myself, just to bear hug me and exclaim, "Crikey, she's angry!" in the voice of Steve Irwin. He laughed so hard at his own joke that he went soft and couldn't continue. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and, in the heat of the moment, I cried out for him to go harder. He then had an exasperated expression on his face, and, in an adamantly offended tone, said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he left the room. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to be dominant during sex. It was so out of character for him, I couldn't help but break into hysterical laughter. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. In the heat of the moment, I said his name. He immediately stopped, gave me a deadly serious look and said "Huh? What?" FML
Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML
Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML
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Top comments
Shipley18 17
I want to know why Steve Irwin is on his mind during sex
ChocolateScyther 19
pull a sting ray on him if he tries it again.
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Comments (73)
Redoxx_fml 22
Instead of the Crocodile Hunter you should make him the girlfriend hunter by dumping his ass
Varieus 30
Over the top much? Although with all these types of FML's it never surprises me seeing a comment saying "dump him/her."
utrax 23
ROFL that doesn't even make any sense, why would she break up with him? Silly.
Zelphoric 25
I'm gonna poke it with a stick!
MasterTron 24
More like poke it with a limp noodle.
thefmlman2011 37
i pictured Gabriel Iglesias doing this in his "I'm not fat, I'm fluffy" special
1dvos_grl3 21
He's angry!!
Zelphoric 25
36, that's where I got it from hahaha
Niz_DD 14
God dammit stop ruining noodles for me!
thefmlman2011 37
yay, a fluffy fan
ChocolateScyther 19
pull a sting ray on him if he tries it again.
Way2Fast8 20
Too soon?
psychopolarbear 28
His show was my childhood T.T
AnirudhR 16
That's dark
Sir_Mitchell15 14
How dare you?
mcaisse77 17
Was this ever modded? Crickey! The beginning sentence doesn't make sense!
alexlots 20
Well that couldn't have gone much worse
theTravinator 21
He could have farted too
Cads1 24
Or yelled bombs away!
kinky44 28
Look at the soize ah thas one!
JKPwnage 27
Ah'm gohnna wrassle it!
_Peppermint_ 34
Don't have sex with him for a month
iiTzNeeNerz 26
Oh, you're one of those. Why do women think it's ok to use sex a weapon?
pleasedie 22
And those are the ones who bitch and moan about being treated unfairly
muarif 19
#26, you! I like the way you think!
Sillsallad 15
I don't, and the last time I checked I was a woman. You'd just punish yourself, because you're not getting any either! Women who goes on sex strikes probably never had decent sex!
Mauskau 36
I'd be annoyed, and then laugh, and then make it an excuse to have even more sex. You're missing out when you just withhold it, and chances are, at one point they'll get it elsewhere instead.
organizse 28
Time to find a new boyfriend.
shemademedoit 20
so you'll dump your boyfriend just because of one bad sex?
Aimeejasmine 15
Not one lmao the FML said she 'actually' started to enjoy it
Shipley18 17
I want to know why Steve Irwin is on his mind during sex
RedPillSucks 33
what? Doesn't every one get hard at the thought of the crocodile hunter? No? Just me?
kaitlynjane 28
Just you and OP, apparently.
Cads1 24
Did he stick his thumb up your butt and really piss you off?
cjfred 13
Obviously, #11, some people didn't catch the (quite fitting) South Park reference.
Cads1 24
You know how it is #43, we can't all have a sense of humor.