Today, my boyfriend and I tried to give his cat medicine. Unfortunately, it reacted in a way it never had before: clawed his arms to bits, bit him so hard a tooth fell out, peed everywhere, including on me, and pooped on the carpet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as my kitten was sleeping on my lap, my boyfriend crept up on us and yelled, "BOO!" to make me jump. I wasn't scared, but the cat was. He tensed up and jumped to the floor. He also apparently had the runny shits, spraying me and the couch on his way down. FML
Today, I took my cat to the vet. As the vet reached to examine him, he hissed, then clawed me instead, and then ran straight into a wall. Now we’re both sitting at the vet's, scowling and injured. FML
Today, I was having a romantic evening with my new boyfriend, until we walked into my bedroom and discovered that my cat had ripped apart my pads and had spread them all over the place. FML
Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house while his plumbing was being redone. I really had to pee, but the toilet wasn't working, so I peed in his cat's litterbox. His cat got defensive, and started attacking me while I peed. My boyfriend walked in and saw the whole thing. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be a funny idea to spray me with a hose while I was holding a kitten, showing her how cute we were. Needless to say, now I'm covered head to toe in cat scratches. FML
Today, my cat fell into the toilet, and I had to save him. I now have a soggy cat and scratched arms. FML
Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML
Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML
Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
AMAN1218 4
that's one mean pussy!
awesomer2000 0
I hope you picked up all the bits of his arms
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (199)
Truth_Nazi 0
Kill it
toxicmurder109 4
pussy went wild
wancho 0
don't **** with the cat
CTM0 3
that's what you get for owning a cat
pinkspaceboundro 0
cats are amazing! something must have been bad wrong with the cat- the op said its never acted that way before. I just wonder how bad the cat got before the ops boyfriend took it to the vet?
inkblotdrummer 6
possibly the funniest FML I've read in days
DalekScythe 0
1: that is painful and gross 2: not much of an FML for you but more for your boyfriend. :P
sinnerg 0
ok. I totally change my mind of getting a cat.
prelim_champ 10
Aww, don't let one bad cat experience ruin cats for you! Cats can be great companions, just gotta find one that fits you =)
Andrea87_fml 3
yes be gentle to the pussy
schaflava 0
are those real?
kindlystfupls 0
wow. I've had to give animals pills and liquid medicine before without any of those incident. It wasn't the same animal nor am I a vet or vet tech. I'm just not a moron lol