Today, a girl puked on me. No warnings, nothing. She just threw up on me, then walked off like nothing even happened. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, I was delivering packages as usual for work. I was dropping off a large letter to a hot girl. Before I turned to leave the girl opened her mouth to say something. Instead, she just vomited all over me. Her letter was my first delivery of the day. I had to finish my job covered in puke. FML
Today, my daughter was feeling sick. She threw up on the floor. As I was cleaning up her vomit, she threw up on my head. Twice. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to a scary movie, hoping I could comfort her at a scary part. Instead when a scary part came on, she reacted by throwing up all over my lap and the person in front of us. FML
Today, my girlfriend was throwing a birthday party and got very drunk. She needed help getting to the bathroom so I picked her up and walked her to the toilet. Assuming she needed to throw up, she instead takes a huge, monstrous crap right in front of me. I can't look at her the same ever again. FML
Today, I greeted my girlfriend with a spinning hug. She got motion sickness and threw up all over me. FML
Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML
Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML
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Top comments
ochomurph 8
Find her and throw up on her
SamSwebb 24
I would have probably thrown up on her in response from the smell alone ... Thats disgusting! FYL
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Comments (93)
thedeej 10
Give her your clothes that she threw up on and tell her to wash them.
teapotrevolt 27
That is so disgusting. Karma sought you out.
sanuxo_ 22
Oh god, I wouldn't just let her walk off like nothing happened.
katydid91 31
When I hear stories like this, I often find myself wondering how people let themselves feel so sick before trying to find a bathroom that they will inevitably won't reach?
brivielle 15
You lost me..
Khaleesi_26 30
#15 is saying why didn't the girl go find a bathroom to throw up in. Because you can tell when you're about to be sick.
Brandi_Faith 34
And even if you can't get to the bathroom in time, at least make sure you're as far away from anyone as possible.
ohcheriecherie 20
and even if you can't get super far away from people, you can puke on the floor instead of on someone...
tigerisabelle 31
Definitely FYL, but probably FHL too, imagine how embarassed she must feel. :/
Brandi_Faith 34
I would normally agree, but in this case it sounds like she was so drunk she wasn't even aware of what was happening or her surroundings let alone conscious enough to be embarrassed.
PenguinBitch 44
Puking on the street wasn't dramatic enough for her. And to walk off like nothing happen like she "blacks out" when she pukes.
TanzWolf 26
Why'd you let her go though?
Ardeku 15
Hopefully it wasn't like spaghetti or milk or something. That's gross either way though
JOEBOBARNOLD 15
Hope you didn't act like it was nothjng
kc_bbg15 14
kids!