Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML
Today, I was bored and started touching myself watching TV. My mother walked into my bedroom with a phone in her hand and yelled, "Stop jacking off and talk to your grandmother." FML
Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML
Today, my mom came in my bedroom without knocking, even though I'd told her to, and caught me masturbating. She stood there in awkward silence before saying, "…Dinner's ready at 6." and left. FML
Today, my mom laughed about hearing me singing in the shower and told our whole family. I wasn't singing, though. I was masturbating. FML
Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML
Today, I was in my room with the door locked and my mom knocked on the door. I said "don't come in, i'm naked!" She said "That's okay!" so she unlocked the door and walked in. I was masturbating. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me masturbating. All I could say was, "Uh, I had an itch…" FML
Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML
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Top comments
Wheredidgrungego 12
Oh I've seen this movie!! ....Pornhub right?
StormGirl142 24
I think you accidentally a few words.
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Comments (285)
token_blackguy 18
Oh, this made my day. Thank you op!
omarecer 3
Were you? Your mom must be really hot
TheSofaKing 7
To bad you did not come right after you made that comment.
tjisnumbaone 5
Are you stupid?
Tmichal1993 1
Because thats intelligent
connor418 0
Aren't you smart
nicolee820 0
Lol nice
Allysaurus 0
Looool similar thing happened but I'm a girl so more awkward
Sabrewulf 8
HAHAHAHAHA!!!
badactor009 0
Now that the cat is out of the bag and your Mom knows that guys beat their meat, you can just make an announcement clearly stating your intent. You don't need to explain yourself or apologize. Turn the tables on her by being bold about it. I'll bet you are not interrupted. "Hey everyone, I am headed to my room to jack off" . Nuff said.