Today, I woke myself up by letting out a long fart. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't fallen asleep while on jury duty. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML
Today, I woke myself up by farting in my sleep, only to realize that the guy I'd brought home from the bar was still next to me. He was awake. FML
Today, I've had bad gas all day. In bed, almost asleep, I felt the urge to fart, and thinking nothing of it, I let it rip. It wasn't a fart. FML
Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke myself up. Everyone heard. FML
Today, in my sleep I let out a couple of farts. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal, but on this night I had slept in my mom's room. She came to check in on me and violently woke me up because she thought I pooped in the bed. Now my entire family knows I fart in my sleep. FML
Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML
Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replied, "You farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML
Today, I woke up from a dead sleep needing to fart. The second I tried to push it out, I realized it wasn't wasn't fart. FML
Today, I farted so loudly in my sleep that it woke myself, my husband, and our cat. The cat let me know he was startled by clawing and biting the perceived threat, my bum. FML
Today, I farted myself awake, in a car full of my boyfriend's family. FML
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Top comments
devildog562 33
Gas chambered the jury.
homesuckfucker 28
This is just one of those FML's that's hilarious, given you weren't the one in the situation. I hope you didn't draw too much attention to yourself, OP. And, don't worry, I doubt you'll see those people very often outside of court.
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Comments (40)
LittleMissShadow 16
Sounds like you were doing double duty...
Ichiya 29
Sounds like the lawyers weren't the only ones full of hot air that day.
DenBriZel 31
I bet you woke up the other poor bored people around you. But really, jury duty is absolutely boring so I think the real FML here is that you were called to it.
sweetest_jenn 18
Did you plead the 5th? Innocent until proven guilty ;)
cjmedic 12
Obligatory "shitty situation" comment that will get downvoted to hell.
scoobydoo75060 7
I thought you only got contempt for opening your mouth
DinosaurTacoTime 18
I voted yes on this when it had a little more information. It said the judge was looking.
camogirl2249 19
This is one of the funniest FML's recently. I hope you guys were discussing not listening to the case!lol
Bandking 12
Jury dooty
ostfaiz 18
and the jury adjourned! and op arrested for using weapons of mass destruction openly :D