Today, I was diagnosed with severe nut allergies. My dad decided to buy jars of Nutella, write "You know you want this" on them, and stick them around the house. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was my birthday. My only birthday present was a cake that my dad bought from Walmart. Well, it sure looked tasty. The only problem: it had nuts on it. Guess what I'm highly allergic too? At least my dad told me he'd "tell me how it tastes." FML
Today, I forgot my boyfriend was allergic to nuts and ate Nutella toast before he arrived. He had just brought me flowers for doing well in an exam and I kissed him. He had a reaction and I had to stab him in the leg. FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a box of chocolates as a present. A few hours later, he texted me saying that the box of chocolates contained nuts. He's allergic to nuts and his mother now thinks I'm trying to kill him. FML
Today, I had an asthma attack. I grabbed my inhaler and found peanut butter on it. I'm extremely allergic to peanuts. FML
Today, my mom baked a cake for the whole family. One spent EpiPen later, I found out there were nuts in it, which I'm severely allergic to. My mom's defense was that she thought I'd have "gotten over" my allergy by now. FML
Today, I grabbed a box of my favorite granola bars, the only flavor the brand makes without nuts, which I'm severely allergic to. A visit to the ER after my throat closed up told me that I'd missed the notice on the shelf, warning that they're now making them with peanuts. FML
Today, my dad yelled at me for buying chunky peanut butter. He wanted smooth. Apparently he's "allergic to peanuts." I had to explain to him why his argument made no sense. FML
Today, I had to go to the ER because of a terrible allergic reaction I had to the cookies my "friend" made for me. She assured me several times that there were no nuts in them. Turns out, she put nuts in them on purpose, to see whether or not I was really allergic. FML
Today, my boyfriend’s mom fed me a new dish containing peanuts, knowing full well I’m severely allergic. According to her, her ancestors “cured” allergies by exposing the person to the allergen. I went into anaphylactic shock. FML
Today, it was my 17th birthday. I didn't want my family to spend money on a cake, so my dad made this delicious apple ring. At least, it was great until my mouth began to itch and my throat closed. I have been allergic to nuts since birth, and my dad put walnuts in my birthday cake. FML
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Top comments
CallMeWindSock 24
Well, you know you do.
fml1365 30
He must be nuts!
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Comments (132)
TheWorldGreatest 8
Just great ! Your father needs a reality check!
rastaams457 6
******** dad, wow, sorry OP
maarkblack 9
Nutella will not affect your nut allergy. Eat all of it.
miyaviichan 27
Glad I moderated this one. Also, your dad seems like a jerk
r1nstang 3
this isn't a FML moment.... your dad has a sense of humor... try to enjoy it. a lot of parents don't know what humor is
Alycat6363 15
Your dad is a cruel, cruel man. Fyl.
ILoveFlowers 15
My mom has a severe nut allergy as well and doesn't let my siblings or me get Nutella because she also has anxiety issues...it's a bad combo...
sehrgutmann 19
I myself am allergic to all nuts, you get used to not having any but it is annoying to always have to double check the ingredients for most desserts and lots of snacks.
worldclassrager 41
Really I have no idea what the big deal is with Nutella I might be the only one who doesn't like it.. Well he'll quit soon if not just his literal love for you will over power if you try some to make him quit...well at least I hope...
ThePaul007 14
You're dad is an evil genius.