Today, I came home from a long shift at work to find that my roommate had completely rearranged all of the furniture. Apparently the new arrangement is supposed to improve the feng shui of our apartment. My bed is in the living room. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML
Today, as usual, I got home to find that my roommate had eaten all my groceries and left a mess behind for me to clean. To be fair, this time she did some cleaning - she "energy cleansed" my room with a sage wand, burning a huge hole in my mattress in the process. FML
Today, I came home from a long day from work, only to find a strange woman in my apartment. She explained that my roommate told her it was OK to spend a few days here. I guess he forgot that the room was mine. FML
Today, my boyfriend moved. He moved from my room... to my housemate's room. FML
Today, I ate dinner sitting on the floor. My petty roommate got pissed off during the weekend and decided the appropriate action would be to lock all the furniture in her room and refuse to give it back. FML
Today, after weeks of coming home to find my furniture all tipped over, thinking the place was haunted, and accepting my boyfriend's offers to come over and "comfort" me, I came home from work early. I found my boyfriend in the kitchen, kicking over all the chairs. FML
Today, my roommate of a year and good friend of several more decided to move out. When I came home from a long work shift, I found all the cupboards emptied out of everything, including all the new stuff I bought to replace what she was going to take with her. FML
Today, I came home after a long day at work to find the furniture in my living room had been rearranged by my mother-in-law. When asked how she got in, she told us she stole my husband's key and made herself a copy. She can now come here whenever she wants, unless I change the locks. FML
Today, and for the past two weeks, the people living directly above me have decided to add rearranging their furniture to their daily routines. Not only that but apparently, 6 a.m. is the most optimal time for them. FML
Today, is my one day off for the week. My mother in law is visiting, and has decided we need to rearrange my living room. FML
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Top comments
epicwaffles 7
I would give him a new face arrangement.
4funzies 13
Bring someone home and improve the Kama sutra.... that might surprise them.
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Comments (74)
vic55jets 13
Time to find an alternative place to live, or maybe change your roommate.
ApollosMyth 22
Or maybe just move his bed back. It doesn't sound like this is a reoccuring problem, so I assume he could just tell his roomate to leave his shit alone and it would take care of the problem. If not, then he should maybe consider switching roomates, but only as a last resort in my opinion.
epicwaffles 7
I would give him a new face arrangement.
4funzies 13
Bring someone home and improve the Kama sutra.... that might surprise them.
KiddoKS 19
If you know how to improve the Kama sutra, you need to share with the rest of the class :)
chanellgymnast 17
It's a sign. He wants you out. Escape while you can!
Deeznutzhairy 7
Nobody can escape the Flung shui ways!
Deeznutzhairy 7
Feng* *sigh*
Deeznutzhairy 7
Oh wait.. Ignore that ^
Iamevil123 16
Epic fail...
SleepWalken 5
Your post's contradict your profile picture..
Warmonger_Smurf 29
You can flung shui his bed into the parking lot.
Deeznutzhairy 7
Well at least you still have a bed :p
Wizardo 34
Change the Feng Shui of your roommates face and then put everything back... simple fix really.
epicwaffles 7
I feel like you deserve the #2 spot and not me.
Deeznutzhairy 7
I feel the same way.
epicwaffles 7
Your profile picture sums up what you're trying to be.
Deeznutzhairy 7
Woah! Just take it easy man.
Wizardo 34
Guys take it easy, don't worry I feel exactly the same way as both of you, I clearly should be number 2 but we can't have everything and alas, I was too slow...
Wizardo 34
And btw Nutz, if you're getting this many thumbs down with that many comments, its time to put down the keyboard/phone and call it a day man, just saying...
PenguinBitch 44
Wait up, let me google feng shui. *googles feng shui*....wow, the room must look nicer OP.
Dracoboxer357 36
Not the end of the world. I say to hell with it, use the bed anyways, he'll get tired of you sleeping there before too long...as long as he is just screwing with you. ;)
an3ph 20
Your feng shui is broken.