Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said, "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He tried to put it in unerected. He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML
Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML
Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home, he was masturbating. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML
Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Pinkfl0yd 9
Doesn't matter; had snacks!
ThatGuyRory 9
Ice Cream makes everything better.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (242)
JGreen15 0
I meant your absolutely gorgeous.
DaBugg 7
I'm a moron.
rlTlk 13
Make sure to be comfortable and "ready" beforehand foreplay is important, girls usually take longer than guys to get as excited. If he was trying to go for it before you were ready it would be hard to go in and could go downhill from there.
wittykitty14 7
If you're not absolutely ready for sex, stuff like this tends to happen-even if you've had sex before. Best of luck though. I'm also very excited to see that you're from VT, (me too :) )
noisebox 1
Maybe he's an ass man....
AshleyCole 0
Okay there is nothing wrong with her picture.shes beautiful..don't be hating.
rikykidd15 4
Doesn't matter had sex ! :D
SettoFail 9
Your fault
THE_A_TEEN 28
Let me guess, 'for not giving him a B.J., durr'?
sandyclaus 15
I'll bet it had to be SOFT-SERVE ice cream :P~
justanotherrando_fml 2
KY Jelly hello