Today, while getting ready to go to bed, I told my boyfriend that I feel depressed due to the lack of intimacy in our relationship. His response was to roll over, fall asleep, and send a deadly fart my way. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, while we were sleeping, my girlfriend and I rolled to opposite sides of the bed. When I woke up, I moved closer and wrapped my arm around her. Her response was to fart in her sleep, resulting in a smell so noxious that I had no choice but to roll back to the other side. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend watching me sleep. I asked him if he was staring at me because he was in love. He replied that it was because my farting wouldn't let him sleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while watching TV. I thought it would be cute to try to kiss him awake like they do in the movies. He farted. FML
Today, my boyfriend's response to me saying, "Most women like a bit of filth in the bedroom every now and again" was to start farting in bed. Not quite what I meant. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML
Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
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Top comments
music_woman1 11
I can't help thinking that if he's this comfortable with you then you've got something special
viper64 10
Well, looks like you have to fart back, OP. Maybe that's his idea of a turn on?
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Comments (84)
MilkMaid75 2
Don't take it personal, you know if he loves you or not! Go with your gut not his farts! There ate many reasons he might not be able to be there for you, most are hard for men to talk about. Wait for the room to air out, and follow your heart!!
graphicstyle7 17
Speaking from experience... most people on this board are going too easy on him. Dump him. If he can't care enough to communicate to you on an important issue, you will forever feel taken for granted. There are guys who would not do that, find one.
SamCrow 1
Maybe you should take a look in the mirror. Seriously....seems that most women decide to look like shit after they find a boyfriend. For future reference, that REALLY sucks.
meemee47 1
I've been there!!! That's why I left the him haha
imawsemee 4
Just look at the bright side, he's not with you for sex, he must actually love/like you!(:
gemini_tw 1
I don't understand why everyone is being easy on him, its no bright side to this, he's your boyfriend he should care if you feel depressed about the relationship and want to do what he can to change it. If that isn't going to be a priority for him dump him!
Kathts7 12
You're from DK Too =D !!!! Anyways, try talking to your boyfriend again and tell him that it hurts you When hé doesn't take you seriously. If hé still doesn't get it, he's not worth it.
lifeisgood_03 8
its what men do.. hahah
SphinxJinx 0
I bet you whined at him. That would sooo get anyone in the mood. If you want some intimacy DO something about it, pamper yourself to feel good about your body, dress up nice and seduce him. Do you just wait for him to seduce you all the time? Or is he a rare man not interested in sex?
MissLily_fml 4
Hmmm perhaps try this talk during dinner like someone else said...but the obliviousness(I mean he could have said at least something!) and farting part...Yikes lol.