Today, I was waiting in the car while my mom went into a store to get beer. A few minutes later, some guy was knocking on my window, telling me to open the door. I started cursing him out, thinking I was getting attacked. Turns out he worked there and was putting the beer in the car. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, when I went to the gas station to buy beer, some underage punk outside asked me to buy him booze. I told him to get bent, but the dumbass cashier had seen me talking to him, and refused to let me buy alcohol because, "This is obviously a sting." FML
Today, I left a coffee shop abruptly to go to my car to let out some really bad and loud gas. My window was partly open because it's broken. A stranger was walking on the sidewalk in front of me. He looked terrified. FML
Today, while I was waiting at the bus stop, a car that looked like my mom's pulled up. Thinking it was actually her, I walked up and jokingly asked what she was into. The guy inside now thinks that I'm a prostitute. FML
Today, after I got in my car in the Walmart parking lot, a creepy man knocked on my window. Since I'm incredibly paranoid and scare easily, I put my car in gear and tore out of there, accidentally hitting another car. Apparently he was returning my phone that I dropped. FML
Today, I was at work, a grocery store, and my manager came up to me while I was on my lunch break. He told me that a customer said someone in the parking lot had been loitering around the cars. I went outside to investigate and saw a drunk man pooping on the front of a car. That car was mine. FML
Today, I parked my car on the street late at night, when I was distracted by a text message. Some guy then gets in my passenger side. Panicked, thinking I was being robbed, I bolt out of my car bruising my head and dropping my phone onto the pavement. The guy meant to get in the car behind me. FML
Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML
Today, I was getting ready to load my groceries in my car when my remote wouldn't work and neither would my key to unlock it. A cute young guy came over, not to help but to ask me what the hell I was doing to his car. My car, that looked exactly like his, was on the other side of the lot. FML
Today, I couldn't get into my car. In an attempt to get in, I broke a window. As I climbed in, the actual owner of the car walked up. Mine was across the street. FML
Today, I got lost trying to find the hospital my sister was giving birth in. I stopped at a store to call my mom for directions. A cop pulled up beside me and knocked loudly on my window asking me to get out. The store had been robbed and I am now a suspect. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Evildude 0
.....So if someone talks to you...........the first thing you think is "he is going to attack me" YDI
paperfox_fml 0
Was he hammering on the window with his fist and bellowing at you all scary-like? I'm guessing not. YDI.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (91)
samthemangee 0
first! and hahah nice try
paperfox_fml 0
Was he hammering on the window with his fist and bellowing at you all scary-like? I'm guessing not. YDI.
teentee401 37
Exactly. What attacker would ask you open the door before attacking you?
Evildude 0
.....So if someone talks to you...........the first thing you think is "he is going to attack me" YDI
jet_fml 0
Not really an FML. Embarrassing, yes, but it's not like you said anything really offensive. You probably won't even see him again.
hustler123 0
OMG LOOKK THERES SUM RANDOM DUDE TLKIN 2 ME IMA BE ATTACKEDD OMG!!!!!!!!!!! HEY MAYBE IF A CURSE HIM OUT HE'LL GOOO AWAY!!!!!...WTF! UMMM U SHUDVE JUS ASKED HIM WAT HE WNTED JEEZ WAT R U LIKE 6 OR SUMTHIN???
kfnnnp 0
Why are people so paranoid these days? There are a thousand reasons why someone might knock on your window.
WowUStupid 0
Why would you curse someone out that's attacking you anyways? That would most likely get you killed...
crankdatIRISH 0
What a stupid-ass. YDI.
average_girl 0
hahah this made my day! this is hilarious.. i would be screaming, not cursing him out! but just knocking on ur window is very attacker-ish...
gymbug_13 0
You soooooo deservded that! Way to freak out. All you have to do is roll down the window a little and say (polightly) what do you want?
emer_helena 0
Nice one.