Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML
Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML
Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he stopped and got dressed. Naked and confused, I figured he’d be right back. Yeah, 20 minutes later with a plate of food for himself. So much for sex. It would've been nice if he told me though. FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, starting to get intimate with him, when one of his friends walked into the room, grabbed my leg, and pulled me onto the floor. His reason? He was hungry and wanted to go to McDonald's. FML
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Top comments
Spencer_CDS 0
Might want to be a bit more specific next time. Lol.
Dillybar 0
Should've asked him to eat you out if he was so hungry...
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Comments (164)
theguardian 0
All of you people who are asking why gay guys use condoms are f*ckin idiots!!! Have you ever heard of STD's? Condoms are used for more than preventing pregnancy. Retardation must have hit you all hard.
waterynuggets 0
FYL if he didn't bring you back a delicious dagwood sandwich
rotisseriechick 0
What a jerk! haha, FYL
kellster 2
That blows, and not in the good way!
DoveOrHawk 5
Not that bad, get over it. Lol. Or get a bf who cooks for you.. hence MINE. :D Lol, Couldn't help it. :P
iamfuckedarenti 0
aids?
xSceneSceneBabyx 0
nothing's better than a sammich! =D
anniebananie 3
1) Saying "sammich" and actually using it multiple times while typing are two different things. It's kind of like saying "lol" in real life. Don't do it. 2) I didn't read it because it was too boring. I can perfectly well read two paragraphs if they actually contain something interesting or informative. 3) "just give in and stick a shotgun in your mouth." = REALLY PSYCHO. Let's not overreact here. (And to beat you to it, my overreaction over "sammich" and your overreaction over this are not even close to the same level.)
jessikaaahhh 0
Maybe they wanted to use a condom for the lubrication, or because they didn't want to risk getting a shitty dick...?
high_on_sharpie 0
well.. you DID give him permission to do whatever he wanted.. just sayin