Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML
Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML
Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he stopped and got dressed. Naked and confused, I figured he’d be right back. Yeah, 20 minutes later with a plate of food for himself. So much for sex. It would've been nice if he told me though. FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, starting to get intimate with him, when one of his friends walked into the room, grabbed my leg, and pulled me onto the floor. His reason? He was hungry and wanted to go to McDonald's. FML
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Top comments
Spencer_CDS 0
Might want to be a bit more specific next time. Lol.
Dillybar 0
Should've asked him to eat you out if he was so hungry...
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Comments (164)
gemmaFML 0
You say your boyfriend yet apparently you're a guy. Wtf?
wolfy_fml 5
That means they are gay. Duh.
paperfox_fml 0
How did you make it to 15 years of age without learning that gay people exist? o.O
freelove_fml 2
FYL for being dumb.
myanichole 22
It's the 21st century. Don't act like it's all that surprising and unusual.
survivalism 0
So, you told him to do whatever he wanted, and then got mad at him for doing what he wanted? OP is definitely a woman.
IGoRawrrx3 0
Ha.. Wow...
lacedheadbands 0
i agree with #22. lately a lot of the FML's have to do with sex and sandwiches...
youaresofucked 0
if think its your bf's way of saying he wants toi be sandwiched - in a threesome of course
saze_fml 0
u did say do whatever u want
krisDEE 0
So your a dude,but you need a condom? If your with your boyfriend? Hmmm,thats odd.
TerraofDarkness 0
@#49 DUH, condoms aren't just to prevent pregnancy, they also prevent AIDS and other STDs from spreading. Just because they're gay (if the gender is right) doesn't mean they shouldn't be safe.
spongebobrocks 0
Okay, wow. Why do they need a condom? Dear lord, are you THAT dumb..? So what if they're gay? They still need a condom to prevent (like #54 said) a myriad of STDs...
DickVanDyke 0
He's trying to ask why he needs a condom with his boyfriend. In a sense, why would you need a condom with your boyfriend? You both shouldn't have any STD's if you've been faithful.
medfly 2
I'm sure all those people who were too unfortunate to have been infected from their mothers with AIDS are totally unfaithful because of this... he may have had sex before they met, and there are also other ways to get infected (although they're considerably less common).
xoxoCheer 0
You're so lucky to have someone that's not serious all the time.
youngboss_fml 2
gay
letitbe56 0
Come on...sex just isn't the same if your stomach is growling! Did he bring enough to share? If not, FYL.