Today, three weeks after my girlfriend told me she was pregnant, she admitted it was a lie. Turned out it was just a test to see if I'd break up with her or not. I didn't, but I did just break the bank buying all the things we'd need for an actual kid. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my ex told me that she's 3 weeks pregnant with my child. Not only was she on her period when I broke up with her last week, her friend let me know that the positive pregnancy test she showed me was a fake that she'd bought online. FML
Today, after nearly a month, I found out my wife isn't pregnant after all. She was just screwing around to win a bet with her friends on how long it'd take me to figure out the truth. FML
Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 months found out she was 4 months pregnant with her ex's baby. She told me I could leave her and she wouldn't blame me, but I decided to stay with her. She told me she loved me and then dumped me because she needed to be with her baby's daddy. FML
Today, my girlfriend tells me she missed her period this month. I felt excited until she said, "I will let you know the results of the paternity test." I was not aware we needed a paternity test. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she's pregnant and I did not take it well. She had planned to record my happy reaction for Facebook; instead she got video of me bursting into tears, and trying to talk her into an emergency abortion. She sent it to my parents to punish me. FML
Today, I found out the hard way that my girlfriend lied about being on the pill four months ago. FML
Today, I had to fake enthusiasm when my girlfriend told me she's pregnant. She has a nasty streak and I was planning to break up with her, but if I left her now everyone would think I’m the bad guy. I actually think she’s capable of killing me if she gets angry enough. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks found out she was 2 months pregnant with her ex's baby. I of course broke up with her because I don’t need exes drama or babies in my life. My mother called me an atrocious human being for not staying with her after only three weeks to raise another dude's kid. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend after 10 months of being away. She was pregnant. She actually had the brass balls to tell me I needed to "Man up and be this child's father." Get the fuck out, you cheating whore. FML
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Top comments
arano 29
Good for you for making the right decision and sticking by your child. However she is a lying bitch and doesn't deserve a guy like you. Put that bitch on the curb and move on.
Moonfate 16
was everything non refundable? Seems easy enough to just bring it back.
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Comments (92)
Reaperbunni 4
Dump her, return what you can and move on.
Stripez234 16
This is one of the cases where women playing mind games like these go too far
IndianaJoe0321 19
Run.
Exsequor 14
Having to make a bunch if returns is a minor inconvenience, not an FML. The fact that your girlfriend is a crazy **** is an FML.
Bearsmomma 30
I kinda felt that was the point he was making with the FML anyway.
Poundit 17
No don't fall for it - it's another trick! She wants to see how you can deal with that change of events for similar experiences in the future!!!
B3K4 4
30 day return policy?
peacemaker159 8
Very immature of her, you shouldn't have to test or play games with your SO. That being said, really early to start buying things. Most wait till after the first trimester, sometimes second.
anonymoususer070 17
That's good for you that you stepped up like a real man and got everything the baby would need. Maybe you can find the receipts and take it all back or give it to someone you know expecting a baby and can't afford some stuff, you may be out the money but helping someone could be the next best thing! Also, hopefully she is your ex-girlfriend now, that's definitely not something to joke about, sorry you got your hopes up OP!
Rainbow_dumpster 28
Congrats, OP! You're Dad material! :D
alaskanessy 8
Hope you have walked away from that hideous liar. Can't imagine why you would go broke buying baby items at that point, hopefully it can all be returned.