Today, I asked my girlfriend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said, "Was that good?" She was serious. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend was giving me amazing head. I was really getting into it, when she looked up, and gave me a thumbs up. I can never take oral sex seriously again. FML
Today, after having waited three long months, my shy girlfriend finally gave me a blowjob. Everything was going really well until I said, "Wow, you're really talented. Anyone would think you've been practicing your whole life." FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a blowjob. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "What's that thing at the back of your throat called?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob. It felt like she was skinning my dick alive with her teeth. I had to pretend to finish myself off in the bathroom and tell her it was because I didn't want her to have to swallow. FML
Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML
Today, my wife was giving me a blowjob when I foolishly asked her how she got so good at giving them. She looked straight into my eyes and replied, "Practising on about six guys before you." FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML
Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to bribe me to be good since we were going out to dinner with her parents by giving me a blowjob. The good news: it was one of the best she had ever given. The bad news: I came on her black dress. She responded by hitting in me in the nuts. Hard. FML
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Top comments
_apecakez 0
LOL! is she like 10 years old, and doesn't know exactly what a ******* is? but that's sort of cute how she's innocent. n____n
Mattrocker 4
Got yourself a keeper I see
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Comments (313)
CourtneeMalakian 0
ok #245 and #244 she is NOT a ***** for giving one and what makes u think she is lying? i gave my first ******* at 14 years old. ur just jealous because ur probably much older and u have never given one, probably cuz no guy would want ur motuh on their penis
CourtneeMalakian 0
for all u people thinking that giving a ******* is being a '*****', it's NOT wow i sucked one guys dick and im automatically a *****? if everytime i sucked his dick, it was someone elses, then YES id be a *****, but ive only sucked his so people, seriously, STFU with all the steriotypes and shit its really annoying
seayjoel 0
She litterly blew? Like with air? OMG LOL! That's pretty funny dude, that aside is she 18?
ABCD1234Z 0
holyshit. #30 shit his girlfriend commented this shit ! damn. how embarrasing. but imust admit it wouldd be funny but he shouldn't of announced it ! ha.
that_guy_you_are 0
You're setting yourself up for years of sexual frustration and low self-esteem if you've been with her a year and a half and she has no idea how to give a *******. I've had that; it screws with your head. You're young; the world's your oyster, don't waste your time with a prude
Isotopic_alloy 0
It would be awesome if she was being a smart ass about it; but still if she's really that innocent you've got a lot of teaching to do well what can I say; enjoy the experience and have fun learning together!
wowfmlife 0
#217 is definitley either a ***** or extremelyyyyy stupid...most likely both
average_girl 0
249... yes it actually DOES make u a ***** if u r involved w/ any sexual activity b4 marriage. it doesnt even matter if uve only done it 2 one guy. :-/ smarty pants. i pledged 2 be abstinent till marriage. and it turns out i am turning 15 next month.. so, yeah, im not some 65 year old virgin whos nvr had a bf. go 2 sex ed and learn something and dont be so obnoxious 2 ppl on the internet.
spidergirl41 0
Listen people. Just because you have sex / engage in sexual activity (oral sex, foreplay, masturbation) before marriage does NOT mean your a ***** or **** or whatever! It just means you want to find out what your getting into (pun intended) BEFORE it's too late. To find out what it's like, to not sit there like an idiot the night of your marriage and say "What am I supposed to do now?". PEOPLE should not tell OTHERS what to do. If a couple wants to have sex and get a disease or get pregnant, THEN LET THEM BE! Just cause you f'ed up on your OWN life doesn't mean you have to do the same to other people's.
funnyyy 0
hahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahaha