disturbed
Ireland
I love the countryside
Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
vetstudentdream
Bellbowrie, Australia
Today, I found out what it feels like to have a cow take a large, flatulent shit with my arm still elbow-deep inside their rectum. FML
abi_vet_student
United Kingdom
Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML
3hoursleftofwork
Milton Keynes, United Kingdom
Today, the magic of witnessing a sheep giving birth was ruined for me when I slipped and fell in the puddle of birth fluids. FML
Face
Australia
Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML
anonymous
This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff
Danger zone
Today, I broke my glasses. How did I break my glasses? A cow kicked me in the face at work. FML
HitbyIce
United States
Today, I was at the theatre watching a movie. There was a lady and a kid behind me. I all of a sudden felt ice hit my head. I turned around and asked the kid to stop, then heard his mom say, "Hit that cow!" FML
Heifer
United States
Milkmaid
Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML
MooCow
United States
Face it!
Today, my best friend told me to face my fear of cows and hop over the fence in with them. This resulted in me being chased by a raging cow, and thrusting myself head first over a fence. FML
Anonymous
Toronto, Canada
Today, my date took me to visit his farm. As we were walking, a wild rabbit darted past me and startled me. I tripped and fell face first into cow dung. FML
moe
United States
Today, I found out what getting slapped in the face with lettuce feels like. FML
Top comments
Rei_Ayanami 18
Ahh, the joys of country living. Fresh air, no noise pollution, and being smacked in the face by cow placenta. P.S. Congratulations on your new calf.
wtfomfgfml 14
You should have mooved out of the way.
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Comments (89)
fsomelife 26
I guess you chose unfortunate placementa for standing.
Wrex 13
That is completely and udderly disgusting.
FrancesShiver 20
I feel like such a horrid, horrid person for giggling at this.
nessparty 5
look on the bright side, you saw a birth of a calf
magpie9820 1
Crows lay eggs.. and don't have placentas
tiernang 21
COW.
FrancesShiver 20
You don't go out much, huh?
meladuh 16
By a placenta of a cow Placenta of a cow Cow
kingdomgirl94 29
Mooooooo not cawcawcaw!
sterling1113 15
I'm wondering how that could have gone unnoticed. Did #20 REALLY think they were the only one to read it 'correctly'? Or did they just not read any of the cow-related comments above? Lol.
rhysfucker 24
Hit in the face with cow placenta once, shame on the cow...hit on the face with cow placenta twice, shame on you.
ola__9213 16
How.
kingdomgirl94 29
Most likely aiding the birth of a calf. If there's some other reason, I'll be both surprised and very very confused.
brand125 17
but how? like did someone purposly throw it at him?
kingdomgirl94 29
They were probably kneeling under the cows ****** to help catch the calf, and bam, right after calf comes the plecenta. Its called the after birth for a reason.
8313girl 28
Well wash your face off. Your day can only get better.
Cynical_1 26
Holy cow! Well...at least you didn't step in it.
buckdharma 38
Paybacks for all those mornings Elsie had to endure your rough, cold hands.