Today, my best friend told me to face my fear of cows and hop over the fence in with them. This resulted in me being chased by a raging cow, and thrusting myself head first over a fence. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went with my family to visit my aunt, who lives on a farm. My brother told me that cows are ticklish and convinced me to go up and tickle one of the cows. The cow clearly wasn’t a fan, and I ended up being chased right into a lake. FML
Today, I was visiting friends in the country, and the property next to theirs has cows. Bored, I walked over to the fence and looked at a cow, who trundled over to the other side of the fence. I then saw the farmer staring at me and for some reason I said, "Just saying hi to your cow!" FML
Today, my date took me to visit his farm. As we were walking, a wild rabbit darted past me and startled me. I tripped and fell face first into cow dung. FML
Today, my dad tried to help me overcome my intense fear of horses (due to nearly being killed by one as a child) by taking me to a ranch. Within 30 minutes, a horse bit my face. FML
Today, I was supposed to be let the bull out of the trailer and head straight home. Someone didn't latch the gate, so it just walked through between pastures. The bull and a cow went through, a horse broke into the cow lot, and another horse had a meltdown and wiped out in mud after trying to jump the fence. I don't like beef cattle. FML
Today, I was sitting on a fence watching a friend play soccer. He accidentally kicked the ball at my face and made me fall off the fence into mud. I laughed it off and got back on the fence. Two seconds later he did the same exact thing. I fell wrong and slammed my face into the fence. Pain. FML
Today, on a whim, I decided to try parkour. I climbed a chain link fence and fell off, right onto my face. Then the owner of the property shouted at me. FML
Today, I went to my cousin's farm with my family. First I was pooped on by a goose, peed on by a puppy, bit in the face by the mother dog, fell through the floor of the barn loft, and without knowing it was electric, rested my hand on the horse fence. FML
Today, while letting horses out to switch pasture, one ran at me, sending me through the electric fence and into a mud puddle. Wrapped in electric fence, I sat in that electric mud puddle, screaming every time it shocked me. Help arrived, once they'd had a good long laugh. FML
Today, I was at a rodeo warming up while my mom unnecessarily bragged about my training skills to a client. My horse then threw me into a gate at a full gallop, in front of everyone. That was the first time he'd ever misbehaved. FML
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Top comments
CrimsonNightmare 0
We all make moostakes
Keyman1212 14
Boy he must have really milked the situation to convince you that your bovine fear was irrational. He sounds like he must have given you some cheesy advice, to mootivate you over the fence. Unfortunately, you were udderly out of luck when attacked by a cow. I wouldn't call you a cow-ard. Just a pussy. Whoops. That's a cat.
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Comments (174)
csoccer3 4
lmao i hope your ok!
TheWaywardOne 0
Cow-ard.
Keyman1212 14
Boy he must have really milked the situation to convince you that your bovine fear was irrational. He sounds like he must have given you some cheesy advice, to mootivate you over the fence. Unfortunately, you were udderly out of luck when attacked by a cow. I wouldn't call you a cow-ard. Just a pussy. Whoops. That's a cat.
MrHughJass 0
^Zing!
heyguysitsjosh 8
Of all things, why are you afraid of cows?
fthislyfe 22
I wish I was there to watch...
raqraqrawr 5
you're*
Vaginabutter 15
Epic
herrobear 0
Anyways.
ohxdamnxkay02 12
Cows = Winning
blanquito 1
fuckka youu chicken... fuckaa you cooow..
smurfsarwales 9
ahaha that one was so funny :D
SGT_DBL 15
South Park refrence, nice...
JoeTheMan12 0
why didn't you moooooove out of the way?
opendoorclosed 8
Damn nature, you scary!
NomOnShroomz 14
72- umm wuhh??
chongers18 0
did you go cow tipping? That usually results in running away from the bigger cows. Haven't you seen Cars the movie? ;)
rainbo955 0
must have been a bull. cows aren't naturally aggressive. unless they've been abused by humans and have some sort of grudge with them, but thats highly unlikely. we have about 170 cows and when we check on them we walk around and pet them and hand feed them and there all really glad to see us.
OreoKami 0
no no its DAYYYYUUUMM NATUREE U SCCURRYY !!!
dolphincheddar 10
moo bitch, get out the hay
missmurderx 8
Were you trying to plank on the cow?
bhawks8188 0
If the op is scared of cows, does he eat beef?
dayellethescene 0
that would be epic!
KiddFlash 0
Don't ever let ur friend talk u into something again
MrMonk 5
Got milk?
BIEBERSLAYER 10
why not that'll make a good story later on.
EffTrae 0
peer pressure
ImaWiseGuy 5
bad form win it comes to jumping fences...
MrSassypants 34
2 why not? I like his friend. All his friend try to do was help OP conquer his fear and OP is fine. If you read the FML carefully all he did was run away and jump over a fence "head first" the way it's supposed to be done. 8)
dolphincheddar 10
I think there a lot less scary in between some sesame hamburger buns. or a nice big hunk of heavily herbed sirloin steak. eating something helps you overcome the fear of it I find. for instance, my grandpa scared me like crazy. but now, problem solved!
atthegates 0
im not scared of ur grandpa anymore either...he tasted like he was past his prime though
foilindo 0
smart up. you do it late at night when they are sleeping!!! you can even cow tip!!!! lol
sxe_beast 11
Cows do nap standing up, but they're pretty aware in that state. I don't commend trying to tip cows =|.
sxe_beast 11
recommend*
CatEyes66 0
I don't know why OP didn't just stand at the fence and wait till the cows came up to him/her. Cows are pretty curious animals, they would of came up and tried to sniff him/her maybe even lick OPs hand. OP would have had a better experience.
ReynshineCutting 10
Not all cows are curious. Ours will always just stare at you and ignore you. Except the roping cows which will chase you if they can lol.
dolphincheddar 10
I only tip them If they have great service
kenzzie9999999 4
It's really rare that a cow sleeps standing up
dreamering 16
Dude, don't go to Spain. There you'll be ****** for the rest of your life
dreamering 16
I didn't know that there are lots of Pamplona fans in here.
ljesm14 1
so...I take it you're still afraid of cows? sorry op, that sucks.
JoeTheMan12 0
Out of every animal in the world...a cow?
livin_plur 0
hey it's a rational fear! they're huge animals, and maybe op had a bad experience in the past
regsworld11 2
Well that was your fault! But I hope you're okay!(:
JustAnotherKid4U 5
thats what you get for bowing to peer pressure
youliketacos 0
HE HAD MAD COW DISEASE. :O
vividlycolor 6
oops I mean "even though I'm not afraid of cows" my bad
Jacobt24 19
You kind of didn't reply to your own post.
youliketacos 0
I was rather confused for a while.
vividlycolor 6
gahhh.. fml on my ipod is totally messed up :(
vividlycolor 6
dude... you're really stupid. even if I wasn't afraid of cows I still wouldn't do that!
ayooBrandon 12
scared of a cow? really, why?
anonymou5e 6
They're big, ugly and drool over your clothes. i still don't get why anyone would be afraid of cows, but those are usually the reasons.
NecroParade 3
But honestly, how would a fear of cows have a negative effect on someone? They're not exactly common house pets.
anonymou5e 6
Depends on were you live; In the netherlands there are fields with cows everywhere. In drenthe anyways.
luvppl 6
These fears are irrational. they can't be helped, and sometimes don't seem to make sense at all, hence the "irrational." There are a lot of irrational fears, like peanut butter, for example, some people are afraid of peanut butter. I have irrational fears of heights and spiders, which are more common. However, they can't really help or explain why they are afraid of cows.
AstroWatermelon 0
so you don't like milk,ice cream,and butter?
rainbo955 0
exactly, cows aren't wild animals, and they're not aggressive.
vividlycolor 6
gahhh i meant even thought i'm not afraid. i was really tired.. typo haha
kenzzie9999999 4
Cows don't droll I've lived on a farm my whole my lie and I have never seen a cow droll
kenzzie9999999 4
Drool*
Umbreon_Princess 12
I can't personally say why anyone else would be afraid of them but I know I am afraid of cows due to an early simi-traumatic experience with them.