Today, I found out my mom has been telling my entire family I need surgery on my "Labia" instead of my "Labrum". I went from needing shoulder surgery to needing vagina surgery with one group text. Thanks, mom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was texting my mom about a surprise visit, and autocorrect changed "surprise" to "surgery." I hit send before noticing, and now she thinks I’m planning some major medical procedure, and has been calling me nonstop to check if I’m OK. FML
Today, I crawled into my mom's room to tell her my stomach was in massive pain. She ended up throwing me out of the room while spraying me with Lysol. My appendix was about to burst and I needed surgery. FML
Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery, and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML
Today, I had debilitating stomach cramps and told my mom, but she said she was too tired to take me to the ER. I had appendicitis. Thanks Mom. FML
Today, my mother told me I've gained so much weight recently, she thinks I should get gastric bypass surgery. FML
Today, my mom came home from surgery. Upon arriving home, she flashed a paper in my face and said, "Want to see pictures of my colon?" My eyes are still burning. FML
Today, I woke up to my mother telling me to sit up and get dressed because we had to go before it was too late. I had just woken up from surgery. She didn't want to be stuck in traffic. FML
Today, my mum thought it was perfectly acceptable to post a status on Facebook about how well she is healing up after her hemorrhoid surgery, and tag me in it. FML
Today, I got circumcised. After the surgery, my girlfriend got drunk and texted all of her friends about it. FML
Today, I had the misfortune of being left alone with my dad. He took it as an opportunity to tell me in detail all about his recent vasectomy, and the complications the surgeon had due to the scar tissue on my dad's testicles. FML
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Top comments
RememberSchlitz 9
I feel you. I had my uvula removed, a long time ago, because of reasons. My little sister told her friends I couldn't talk for a couple days because I'd had my vulva removed. I don't have a vulva. I never had a vulva. They are not part of the standard equipment package for guys.
mylonius 19
Good luck with your ****** surgery.
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Comments (33)
Szaszaspasz 26
You are going to need a fair bit of surgery before you even have a labia (or ******). Damn words can be so close in spelling and sound. How did your mom react when she realized this gaffe?
fictionaldiary 11
Is your entire family made up of small children? Just correct them.
Fartful_Dodger 8
Auto- correct strikes again! bwa-ha-ha-ha.
8djht8 19
as if anyone would recognize labrum anyway
ohSNAPyall 27
Seriously, just say "shoulder" to everyone from now on. Rule of the grapevine.