Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after vacuuming, I struggled to pull the nozzle attachment out. I yanked it too hard and it flew out, hitting me in the face and causing my head to jerk back into the wall behind me. My girlfriend had to drive me to the hospital for my concussion. FML
Today, I felt something hit my eye as I was riding on my bike. My glasses ended up falling off. I looked for them for ten minutes before giving up. I ran over them. FML
Today, while coming home from school on my bike, I lost control of it, and went straight into a light pole. Thankfully I was at a very low speed. After that, someone splashed puddle of water at me with their car. After getting to home, I went to take a bath during which the shampoo went into my left eye. It's still hurting. FML
Today, I parked, then opened my car door to get out, and somehow managed to practically knock myself out by banging my head on the frame, then on the car door that had slammed back into my forehead as I was still reeling from hitting the roof. A guy walking by asked if I was okay while trying not to laugh. FML
Today, after having a pretty rough day, I decided a nice, hot shower would be great. Ten minutes in, the shower head apparently couldn't take the water pressure anymore, and it flew off and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML
Today, while cleaning behind a ladder, I banged my head on one of the hand rails. I stood up, cursed, and moved to the other side. To my luck, I hit the other side of my head. I now have two lumps perfectly placed as horns on my head. FML
Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML
Today, I accidentally super-glued my hand to my face while trying to fix a broken pair of glasses. I yanked it off in a panic, taking a patch of my face along with it. FML
Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML
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Top comments
FMLephant 2
Were you washing the mystery machine Velma?
paxpervitam 0
jinkies! I can't find my glasses!
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Comments (71)
starile 20
How did it just come whipping around on its own, if it wasn't you twirling it about?
BoyFromTheFuture 0
dude it's probably at one of those self washes where the hoses are fed from a rotating pipe spinning parallel to the ceiling. whenever I use those I end up getting hit at least once when the hose releases after getting stuck on the corner of the car.
stephanie0613 0
haha wow this fml made me laughh ! fyl :)
phired7 0
this is the only fml to ever make me burst out laughing.
thisisLAUREN 0
that wouldve been hilarious for a 3rd party viewer. (:
ugwmii 0
paid to get smacked
manforgot 1
That sucks. D: I'm practically blind without my glasses so I definitely would have stepped on them too. Glad it wasn't me! :D
belkinbra 12
My glasses! My glasses! I can't see without my glasses.
AndreaM_fml 0
I agree with number 2, I'm also blind!
ZleveL 0
the hose came and whipped you one the side of the head! sounds like what I did to yo momma last night!! :( I'm not funny
ZleveL 0
your words hurt me :( I'm gonna cry in the corner now, I hope you feel good, jerk!!! >:"(
Shookitup 0
Nice try :)
ZleveL 0
aaaawwwwww :3 thanks 10!! hey I like xbox too! just not mw2, too many mlc's, m203's , OMA's, etc.
Shookitup 0
Oh, I can't wait for Black Ops to come out :)
ZleveL 0
oh me too! and reach, brotherhood, Gears 3. I'm moving to a school though and I can't take my xbox so I won't be able to play for 2 years D":
Shookitup 0
Yikes! O: I'm sorry, but that's okay because Xbox is pricing the Live accounts for a year higher by the end of November
ZleveL 0
my uncle works on the xbox team at Microsoft in Seattle ;) I got forza 3 new for 14 bucks :D
anorexicbarbie 8
COD sucks. I just got back from the midnight release of Halo Reach. :)
ZleveL 0
18 AAAAAHHHHH I'm gonna steal it from you ;) have you played it yet?
FrecklesXO 8
My husband won't let me buy Halo Reach just yet. Shouldn't it be the other way around?! Haha
Senseless_487 29
I'm picking up Halo Reach as soon as I get off work! :D
ZleveL 0
24 yeah it should! :p slap him around a little, he'll let you :) and if all else fails, it's BJ time. :o 25 lucky!
Senseless_487 29
Yeah, can't wait, but since I work graveyard, I'm gonna make myself get some sleep before I play :(
thisisLAUREN 0
halo reach is dumb the only good halo game was the first one. cod is better.
lickmyjock 0
40 speaks the god damn truth like a winner.
The_Shaman_Of_Se 0
cod is wayyyy better then halo
anorexicbarbie 8
40 is just plain dumb, Halo Reach is a damn good you, stop being butthurt because the story is too complicated for you. COD really has no story, you just fight. In conclusion, Mass Effect Series > Halo Series > Frogger > CoD series
anorexicbarbie 8
have no idea where that extra you came from Anyways, cod can be fun but the multiplayer is always the same.
annanonomus 0
I'm sorry OP. Maybe get contacts now?
FirstBornUnicorn 0
Sounds like an amazing fight scene the way you put it. That hose made you it's bitch.
The_Shaman_Of_Se 0
ur picture scares me 0.o
bartholemew4life 0
ditto. how creeper
chuy92 0
sucks more that you got whacked on the head
FYLDeep 26
Good thing your glasses came off. Otherwise you would have to watch yourself get hosed.
FMLephant 2
Were you washing the mystery machine Velma?
xxniteskie 1
My thoughts exactly. Well done.
Jimboom 12
You just got pimpslapped by a hosepipe. You are now the hoses's bitch. Enjoy!