Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on a date, and I went to put my arm around her, trying to be romantic, but my coordination went straight to hell. Instead of her shoulder, I ended up accidentally grabbing her tit. FML
Today, a cute girl was walking towards me. She held up her hand for a high five, so I also did the same. I hadn't noticed her friend behind me, and was left hanging and embarrassed. FML
Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML
Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML
Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML
Today, I accidentally touched someone's boobs. It was a man. And I noticed that they were bigger than mine. FML
Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML
Today, I got lunch with a girl I really like. On the way, for some idiotic reason I decided it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the red hand on a traffic sign. I ended up slipping and slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on my face. FML
Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall. In the spur of the moment I thrust my arm up to catch it. I didn't catch the bag, but I did catch her boob. I had to sit next to her for the rest of the flight. FML
Today, I was walking down the strip with a friend when we saw a homeless man with no arm. I felt bad, so I gave him some cash and I looked into his poor little eyes when he put out his arm for a hug. Without thinking, I hugged him. Right as I was thinking, "WTF am I doing?" he kissed my boob. FML
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Top comments
zakkyzebra 11
"**** first base, this bitch is mine!"
namhowell 6
Well you at least got that much action even if you 2 never go out.
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Comments (185)
singhjr96 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
First
singhjr96 0
Atleast you got that much action from gere though
zakkyzebra 11
It look less than 7 minutes for your comment to be ignored on my iPod due to the amount of thumbs down votes. Congratulations.
singhjr96 0
I know thats just sad. I couldn't really think of anything good to say so i was like aww hell why not. Did I break and record for bein ignored? Anyone?
zakkyzebra 11
**** YOU. I was taking a shit when I looked at your profile picture. Holy fuckkkk....
singhjr96 0
The toilet rape. Now i'm scared
zakkyzebra 11
xD wtf? that was in reply to 15.
zakkyzebra 11
FML, ******* up people's comments since the dawn of time.
singhjr96 0
Lol XD
singhjr96 0
Yeah i'm un ignored now :D
singhjr96 0
And a minute later ignored again:(
YourEvilHero 12
today this creepy stalker guy randomly reached out and touched my boob. fml
baddud300 6
Next time you may as well go for her ass.
Marktheshark 0
Hahaha it's like super bad!! When he punched her in the boob an then the super awkwardness follows
TheFunSideOfTheB 2
Why does it say I agree your life sucks there should be EPIC WIN to vote
seanders 10
I don't see the problem here. Especially since there was no "she slapped me" or "she then called me a pervert and stormed away."
nerdfighteria 7
16- Then why did you bother saying anything at all?
roger507 0
There's something wrong if you feel that its an FML
namhowell 6
Well you at least got that much action even if you 2 never go out.
austinkiser 3
it's a miss understanding he's a midget so he might still have a chance
Synapse_fml 0
lol pulling the midgit card huh... :) atleast dude got boob to hand
shmeggles 3
someone totally did that to me!!
santarosakid 5
I bet that after she tried giving you a high five but it ended up on your face instead
Miss_Michaela 10
I've done it to a friend before. Awkward situation. :/
NastyNinja31 0
We all kno u were checking for Brest cancer
Absurd101 0
Today, this really perverted guy went to high five me as i walked past then he grabbed my boobs. FML
AaronTkr 0
SCORE!
Andrew1122 0
even better
NKG7896 3
id give you a high five just for getting to 2nd base
F2M2L 5
Well op at least you got some good out that situation.
talensledge1 0
My gf let's me grab her boobs :D
pertained 12
-hiboob-
ILoveEggnog 7
I don't know any girls that find random boob slapping a turn on. Good luck with that.
wolflover44 5
Why? You don't think every girl just loves being slapped so that big bundles of fat bounce? Gee, what world do you come from? Smack dat! I love sarcasm
Synapse_fml 0
what!!?!?!??! I thought only i was turned on by that! :o i too love sarcasm
knights95 9
I can't thumb down your comment from my iPod.
Ali_Br_fml 33
you have to scroll then swipe for the thumbs... Keep testing, it's not directly in the middle... And OP, if it was an accident, I'm sure she'll understand later. when I was in middle school, some guy who liked me did that by accident, but I knew it was an accident, so I didn't make a fuss of it. Good luck with your girl troubles.
nikkilorenz7 5
you spaced so much on your comment, that everytime i try to click the thumbs down button on my iPod, it won't let me.
gander25 4
Yeh you can, tap on the comment itself and you can
AaronTkr 0
66 shouldn't have so many likes for being retarded. he just has to click the comment itself.
partyfool2011 4
66-if I could I would thumb down it for you
MsRandomKatie 0
Look who earned the title of creep! Congratulations!
agaba 0
Yea I dont know what's worse the fact that that happened to me before or the fact that my name is James and I'm in massachusetts O_o I never submitted an FML for this
mmccombs13 0
fml??
larisonr 4
He didn't earn that title! He got there by lucky accident. I worked hard for years to get there.
Rose8u 2
well, there's another reason he might not like you
whatfml 0
she*
missmilf 6
lol fail:)
Rose8u 2
well, there's another reason he might not like you
missmilf 6
she*
OneBigMessUp 5
Lol
doof234 0
ummmm..... I don't think milf is much of a turn on...
Babalu722 3
yes it is.
Jacobt24 19
OP, we all know it was on purpose. Good job ;)
saksxalmo 20
It was a Freudian slip.
zakkyzebra 11
"**** first base, this bitch is mine!"
RawrGoesTheDino4 0
Lmaoo
jessthebest3 0
High-boob!
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
High boob! Low ******! >:D
Absurd101 0
137 YESSSSSSSS thank god its not otherway around... Though maybe it is during 69...
BeatlesObsessed 12
And then she gave you a low-five in the balls?
tsim_fml 0
Correction: A low 4, she actualy lost a toe when she dropped a knife on herself dhen she was 7.
L1v3_L0v3_Lau9h 18
#40, what are you on about? -.-
seeunexttuesdays 6
Hahahah I love how #40s comment was not only completely irrelevant, but was also stupid and not funny. If you're gonna make irrelevant comments, at least have them be funny. Moron.
ShawnzieNstuff 6
If that was the case he would have gotten to feel her boob and she would have touched his balls all in one day. Farther than most guys get with their crushes. Haha
darknova131 4
Haha 69 likes
DaRealMrMurphy 0
#40 could have just said the funniest thing ive read today!!! LOLZ ^_^