Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my husband was eating me out when he suddenly lifted up my hips and started licking my asshole. I screamed for him to stop, since it was disgusting. I don't think I can ever have sex again. I can't believe I married someone who would do that. FML
Today, just after got home, my husband, instead of offering to cook dinner or massage my feet, said, "Does this look a funny colour to you?" and showed me a selfie of his asshole. And yes, it did, so of course I had to book a doctor's appointment for him because he can’t even do that by himself. FML
Today, my husband and I got into a fight because I refused to let him use my fingernail to clean the plaque off his teeth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate with each other, starting with some foreplay. Before he fingered me, he put on a blue surgical glove, claiming that "down there is dirty and smelly" and he didn't want it on his hand. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me how women could urinate with a tampon in. FML
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML
Today, my husband called me into the bathroom to wipe his ass, as he's become too fat to do it himself. I don't know what's sadder, the fact that I did it or the fact that I miss when he was at least ashamed to ask. FML
Today, my husband has both arms broken, and I have to help him in the bathroom. Not the problem. My girlfriends and I have been pranking each other lately and it's been fun, but they decided to slip my husband slip him some laxatives so that I would have to clean him him. FML
Today, I discovered that my husband doesn't wash his hands after using the toilet. Too bad I got to found out after three years of marriage, and while his finger was in my mouth. FML
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Top comments
PANDORUM89 21
perhaps Instead have him go pick you up some pads for the time being until you can insert your own tampons?
MeowntainMix 18
That sucks. If he can stick his dick in there, he should be able to put a tampon in there
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Comments (215)
vikky538 29
Ask him to put that tampon inside you using his tongue. He will do it.
biopilot17 9
Well how clean is your asshole
chelseaclaire 12
For some odd reason I read my brother instead of my husband and I was really freaked out for a second
sidpool912 14
that must suck shit
polariz 16
That... is... disturbing... ;-;
lolszilla 14
If he can perform the finger thing then he should have no problem helping you out. Plus OP's husband should help her knowing the fact she burned both her hands and is only asking for help when it is needed the most. Anyhow, best of luck with him OP
Elban 20
What a puss. Babies make a of a lot more of a mess. Put the trash can nearby if he does get sick. Wear a mask do something. If your woman needs you then get to it
givethisguyahug 7
This Fml took a wild twist! He should do it!
itsme82 18
I hope he's in a position where he needs your help someday and you can tell him no. As your husband he should be stepping up to the plate and helping you. Did he think it was easy for you to ask? I mean.. Kind of a jerk response. I hope you found a solution and I hope your poor hands heal quickly.
WOTAN1488 24
Growdy to the maxy pad