Today, my husband and I got into a fight because I refused to let him use my fingernail to clean the plaque off his teeth. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my husband and I got into an argument over him not brushing his teeth. It ended with him snapping his toothbrush in half. He's 52. FML
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Today, I had to beg and argue with my boyfriend to get him to take a shower and brush his teeth. This has become a recurring argument now we're confined together. FML
Today, after my husband yelled at me for wasting money by getting my nails done, I decided to buy the supplies and watch YouTube to figure out how to do them myself. He then yelled at me for wasting money on the supplies. FML
Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML
Today, we had an argument and my husband called my mother right in front me. Two minutes later, she was on his side and yelling at me on FaceTime that I’m a bad wife, a pain in the ass, and a nagging bitch. The argument was about him leaving tools around for me to step on and cut my foot open with. FML
Today, I had to beg my boyfriend to get him to take a shower and brush his teeth. This is a basic weekly argument. FML
Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML
Today, my husband tried to annoy me by slurping on his almost-finished drink. I yelled at him to knock it off. Later, our daughter told her class that mommy and daddy had been fighting about his drinking during breakfast. FML
Today, my husband stabbed me with his unusually long, nasty toenails in the leg while he slept. It took 3 stitches to fix it up, my husband and doctor laughed the entire time. He still refuses to cut them. FML
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Top comments
EvilLilCupcake 10
Instead of throwing a plate at his head, like in the movies. Throw a toothbrush.
eddeeezzyy 19
I find this hard to ********** to...
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Comments (83)
FLgators93 3
thats just nasty.why would he even want to?
MetalxSoldier 26
I dont know but she should have scratched her ass then said, "okay, here you go!" :)
gamercanadian 11
^ you might want to re-check what you just typed up there.
Jonkbaby 23
leave him.
MyChemicalSmosh 4
#28 You don't get it do you?
scarletchamber 0
cut your nails op so he wouldn't ask u
EvilLilCupcake 10
Instead of throwing a plate at his head, like in the movies. Throw a toothbrush.
unluckiestperson_fml 14
And hefty amounts of toothpaste.
xXxIracebethxXx 14
Your grammar... It kills me...
MoonPhase123 4
He could've just used a toothpick, floss or toothbrush. He had many options, but instead insisted on using his wife's fingernail instead. >:U
LMA0 5
24- Your face... It kills me...
CringePotato 14
Oh jeez. I just thought about fingernails scraping on ceramic plates. *cringe*
jtthegr8 26
Floss? Toothbrush? Both?
alpaquette91 9
Naw, they use chewed up sticks with crushed peppermint leaves.
ninjuh_wingman 29
If thats how he cleans his teeth, I wouldnt go anywhere near his mouth.
AsianCookie247 14
What's your fingernail have that his doesn't..? Can't he use his own. What a strange couple you two are.
yunilee7 4
He shouldn't use anybody's nails, including his own. He should use a thing called a toothbrush.
AsianCookie247 14
Oh sorry! It cut off the other part of my comment. I added "and what the hell ever happened to using a toothbrush?".
Bball_boy15 3
^sure it did ;)
xattitudegurlx 13
Thats attractive.
CheckItOutItsYou 7
eww
xattitudegurlx 13
Its sarcastic
ankoku 2
Next time don't forget the "..."
ambamm135 7
That awkward moment when your sarcasm is so good people think you're serious.
melij99 5
That awkward moment when you realize nobody likes "that awkward moment" jokes but yourself.
IStoleTheCookies 16
Lmfao.
jbloogle 10
I understood your sarcasm..
nofearjenshere 12
41- I like "that awkward moment" jokes.
missalkali 8
my dad used to check for plaque with his fingernail to see if i brushed my teeth properly when I was a kid. I think I'm still traumatized.... :P
BeccaHugs 17
Cool story, bro.
unluckiestperson_fml 14
I feel sick from all this plaque talk in the comments
outch_fml 0
Thanks for sharing?
iamyummylicious 14
I'm so confused.
Coffeebang 17
Ew
eddeeezzyy 19
I find this hard to ********** to...
cierraashlee 5
Lol