Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML
Today, I was getting one of the best blow jobs I have ever received. My girlfriend was getting into it when I heard an "uh oh". Her tongue ring got twisted around the hair close to my balls. She started to pull, I started to scream. FML
Today, I met a girl at a bar, we had a few drinks and really hit it off. We headed back to my place to get a little action. As she was riding me, she got rougher and rougher until she reached down and yanked a patch of hair right out of my beard. I yelped in pain and didn’t even finish. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
Today, my girlfriend agreed to doing it doggy style. During it all, I pulled on her hair. I guess I pulled too hard, because when I let go, her face smacked straight into the bedside table. FML
Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML
Today, my boyfriend was playing with my hair, when his hand got caught. He ended up ripping out a handful of hair trying to get it free. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend oral, and he got so into it that he grabbed my hair. Just as he was about to climax, he pulled my hair so hard that my extensions came out. I jerked back and hit my head on the wall behind me. He then came in my hair. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML
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Top comments
cats400 16
She's the bitch...
aruges93 12
She's a feisty one
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Comments (137)
BurnDownTheDawn 11
Maybe the solution is to be bald. Or get a more gracious girlfriend. Either way.
HaneenDixon 16
I vote for the second one. If this is how she acts when she's been pleased, God knows how she is when she's actually pissed! Run Op,run like the wind!!
Enslaved 38
I think being bald is the meaning behind the OP's name being-- Walter White. . .
onorexveritas 24
it may result in scratching instead
EmilieAutumn 7
Return the favor by telling her you're going to try abstinence.
KingCeltic77 18
I would make sure that that's her last ******, for your own safety.
SaxophoneHero 12
That must have been a hair raising experience!
brittyboo123 35
I guess you might be going bald soon...
Xotoolyxo 16
Your girlfriend's a freak (; Keep giving her orgasms like that and you won't need haircuts
r0cks0 6
Sounds like a leather and latex moment
3rdbass 9
OP's name FTW.
lyssgross 16
Good for her? At least you know your good enough to satisfy someone with really huge confidence.
dr_snow_bear 29
Shove it up her butt and tell her the same thing.
perei176 9
Talk about your own butt