Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom to pee. I looked at the toilet paper after I wiped and saw a spider on it. It was still wiggling its legs. FML
Today, with water in my eyes, I stepped out of the shower and rubbed my face with a towel. When I looked in the mirror, I realized there had been a giant spider on the towel. Its guts and legs were smeared all over my face. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML
Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom at a party when I noticed a spider the size of a golf ball on the toilet paper roll. I screamed, tripped over my own feet trying to flee, and fell right into the bathtub. Everyone at the party heard. FML
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Top comments
iWantACookie95 0
You shouldn't of killed that spider, fear for your life, my friend. fear.
khung835 6
i saw that once when i was a kid. yeahh like 15 years ago. I used a staff to killed a big spider in my bathroom and thousands of baby spiders crawled out from her stomach. It freaked me out so I wet a cloth with gasoline and burned them all :D
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Comments (183)
hockeygurl1234 0
i would had a heart attack. period.
urcatsonfire 2
At least you were in the right place to shit your pants.
hellryu 20
I honestly would have cried, I am a pussy when it comes to spiders.
Seduisant 7
Haha where do you live?
Lookinforlove10 1
Ahhhh omg I would of freaked the hell out!
Here4theshow 17
Payback!
ArielTheMermaid 17
Omg that would freak me out too
MonGuillaume 2
They've gathered to avenge their father's death!!!
xaer0babiix0 0
Lesson of the FML: don't wear pajamas. sleep in your birthday suit.
BB14_fml 0
Well at least you were on the toilet so you didn't shit your pants. XD