Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom to pee. I looked at the toilet paper after I wiped and saw a spider on it. It was still wiggling its legs. FML
Today, with water in my eyes, I stepped out of the shower and rubbed my face with a towel. When I looked in the mirror, I realized there had been a giant spider on the towel. Its guts and legs were smeared all over my face. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML
Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom at a party when I noticed a spider the size of a golf ball on the toilet paper roll. I screamed, tripped over my own feet trying to flee, and fell right into the bathtub. Everyone at the party heard. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
iWantACookie95 0
You shouldn't of killed that spider, fear for your life, my friend. fear.
khung835 6
i saw that once when i was a kid. yeahh like 15 years ago. I used a staff to killed a big spider in my bathroom and thousands of baby spiders crawled out from her stomach. It freaked me out so I wet a cloth with gasoline and burned them all :D
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (183)
gaypeoplesuck 0
ewwwww! ****!
roquette5710 8
That is so creepy. I had that happen once but it was a spider I smashed on the floor. It freaked me out. I killed them with windex... It's a very scary thing. I would have freaked had they been above me.
Enzi_fml 21
Ew, wtf. I'm not even arachnophobic and that makes me squirm.
amgoette 4
AHHHHHH OH MY GOD
The_9th_Doctor 18
I hear flamethrowers work real well
amisenho 11
It's OK; I didn't need to go to the bathroom in my house for the rest of my life, anyway.
gazettefan42 8
Spiders don't live very long indoors anyway. The air pressure in a building suffocates them
JoelsLastNight 18
Thats Australia for ya. We have some bad arse spiders. I once had one big bird eating spider fall on me.
lokland 12
Omg that really sucks.
giannalsf 9
I would have ran for my life pants down and all did you see that one movie where the spiders take over the world yea I would just run for my life!!!!