Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom to pee. I looked at the toilet paper after I wiped and saw a spider on it. It was still wiggling its legs. FML
Today, with water in my eyes, I stepped out of the shower and rubbed my face with a towel. When I looked in the mirror, I realized there had been a giant spider on the towel. Its guts and legs were smeared all over my face. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML
Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom at a party when I noticed a spider the size of a golf ball on the toilet paper roll. I screamed, tripped over my own feet trying to flee, and fell right into the bathtub. Everyone at the party heard. FML
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Top comments
iWantACookie95 0
You shouldn't of killed that spider, fear for your life, my friend. fear.
khung835 6
i saw that once when i was a kid. yeahh like 15 years ago. I used a staff to killed a big spider in my bathroom and thousands of baby spiders crawled out from her stomach. It freaked me out so I wet a cloth with gasoline and burned them all :D
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Comments (183)
Imp_hat 1
Well, she is in Australia..
Pandaxox 10
Wow. A lot of people here REALLY dislike spiders. In my opinion, spiders are sooo fascinating to watch! Just a few weeks ago while I was watching youtube videos, I turn my head to see a HUGE (for Nova Scotia, anyway) spider and I just calmly picked it up and placed him outside.
BananaSantos 15
I would have ******* died man.
Moonunit226 19
At least you were in the right place when they scared the shit outta you!
pizzzzza 14
I got paranoid after I read this. who's with me?
Jakk100 20
I'm reading this on the toilet, I'm now afraid to look up...
becca123rto 12
Oh **** no I would have burned that house down
sjhughes0000 6
on this episode of hell no....
TheLynx_fml 20
Only Australia
Boomi 39
"Today, mommy left me and my hundreds of brothers and sisters in the web so she can go hunting so the flies wouldn't bother the humans. From the next room over, we heard a human freak out and mommy's cries before she was killed. Then the human came into the bathroom and saw us. I'm currently hiding and hoping they won't find me. FML" (Seven years late, but RIP mommy spider)