Today, I'm getting married. I have a big poofy white dress and, oh yes, the shits. Here's hoping I can make it down the aisle without rushing off to the toilet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it's my wedding day, and I have uncontrollable diarrhea. FML
Today, I had diarrhea and shit myself. During my wedding. In my wedding dress. FML
Today, I sharted during my wedding vows. FML
Today, at noon, I'm marrying the love of my life. It's 4 a.m. and I can't stop vomiting and shitting. FML
Today, I started my period. I am getting married tomorrow. So, not only am I going to be on my period for my wedding night and honeymoon, my best friend has to help me change my pad because my dress is so big. FML
Today, I woke up with bronchitis and hemorrhoids. I'm getting married in 3 days. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. The best part was when we were taking photos and I threw up on my dress. At least the pictures were outside. FML
Today, I walked down the aisle when a bug flew into my mouth. In a response, I threw up on my beautiful white wedding dress. I had to party and be in the pictures in someones spare pink dress for the rest of the day. FML
Today, it's my wedding day. It was meant to be perfect. The bouquet, along with a high pollen count, set my hay fever off. I walked down the aisle in front of 200 people with streaming eyes and a runny nose; I then had a sneezing fit during my vows and blew a large snot bubble. Real attractive. FML
Today, I found out that explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the altar, while my husband said his vows. FML
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Top comments
hereicomment 18
Well, shit happens.
amypr 20
Hopefully your dress has enough "poof" to hide some Depends! Good luck.
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Comments (79)
HJKM_fml 19
Maybe it's nerves. Have you tried taking Immodium?
Nexoux 18
Well you're getting a memorable wedding one way or the either, so you've got that going for you. Congrats on the marriage btw
ThepurpleCow 19
Fun story to tell.
MAD01502 20
You should swallow a table spoon of raw rice. It works for me everytime
GnaR_KiLL5150 12
I've never heard that before, I'm going to have to give that a shit. *shot
MAD01502 20
It also helps when you have stomach cramps :)
DylanHasClass 17
Nervous *****
lazyslumber 18
Try using adult diapers. Happy married life OP
cryssycakesx3 23
shitty wife, shitty life?
XBurytheCastleX 25
There's medication that can help.
alex_gen 39
F.I.S.H. (if you know what I mean.)
Olivia93 20
Imodium OP just bung your self up with Imodium !! Probably your nerves getting to you. Hope your wedding went without any unpleasant surprises ✌️?
Witchylady 18
Or worse poop walking down the isle. Good luck. I hope you feel better soon.