Today, I finally had the best sex I've ever had with this really hot guy I've been hanging out with lately. I thought everything was all well and good until he turned to me and said, "You know, your orgasm face kinda reminds me of Steve Martin, but in a good way." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML
Today, I was having sex with someone I've been casually seeing. He got all weird during it, and said, "That's a good girl". Once he left, I told my housemates about it. Now every time I do something nice for them, they respond, "That's a good girl". FML
Today, after sex, my boyfriend turned to me and said, "You know, sometimes, you look like Kevin Spacey." FML
Today, my boyfriend gushed for several minutes about how amazing it is that I suddenly look hot when he takes his glasses off. FML
Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me an amazing orgasm after a long dry spell. I moaned his name as I climaxed, and he replied, "What?" FML
Today, I had sex for the first time with a guy. After he passionately made love to me, I turned to him and said, "You smell really good." He turned to me and said, "You don't." FML
Today, as I was getting dressed after having sex with a guy I like, he told me I looked better with my clothes on. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML
Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML
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Top comments
Not_Impressed13 9
The important thing to remember is that you had an ****** face.
Ashamed_Sister 60
Maybe he can enjoy a Steve-Martin-face because he is secretly gay. At least your face reminds him of something good.
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Comments (70)
PenguinBitch 44
So you basically look like an old guy when you ******. Or maybe he meant to say Ellen DeGeneres but confused the two.
Bakarra 22
I could see a mixup of Steve Martin and the late great Leslie Nielsen, but Ellen is a bit of a stretch...
zandalee 20
:8 Oh no! Is Leslie Nielsen dead?! I love him... Damn, I didn't know that.
Bakarra 22
FML: News for Slowpokes. Yea unfortunately he's dead and yea he was awesome it's a shame many people of this generation wouldn't have heard of him...
Redglare 8
I don't understand what possesses people to say things like this and still think the other person will take it as a compliment.
ex_stripper_jk 20
Exactly! Like, figure out how to talk to a woman before spewing asinine thoughts post-coitus.
NewYorkMexPR 14
Doesnt matter. U had sex
Jharrist89 12
Lmao, he's a keeper
eyesmile27 7
He gave you an ******! Doesn't matter what your ****** face looks like, he still induced a friggin ******! Be happy you don't have a guy who just cares about themselves.
amifaiyaz 12
At least it's in a good way?
Obey_StudBoii 23
Lol. Just as long as you have an ****** face and you both can laugh about it later then I'd say he's a winner.
monpetitchevelle 4
Oh he's a keeper! His certainly has his way with words?
JJ_Rokk 10
Could be worse. He could've said it reminded him of Grumpy Cat.
maximus_prime 24
Steve Martin stared as the Jerk in the movie of the same name, OPs hot friend will be doing the jerking on their next encounter.