Today, I finally had the best sex I've ever had with this really hot guy I've been hanging out with lately. I thought everything was all well and good until he turned to me and said, "You know, your orgasm face kinda reminds me of Steve Martin, but in a good way." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML
Today, I was having sex with someone I've been casually seeing. He got all weird during it, and said, "That's a good girl". Once he left, I told my housemates about it. Now every time I do something nice for them, they respond, "That's a good girl". FML
Today, after sex, my boyfriend turned to me and said, "You know, sometimes, you look like Kevin Spacey." FML
Today, my boyfriend gushed for several minutes about how amazing it is that I suddenly look hot when he takes his glasses off. FML
Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me an amazing orgasm after a long dry spell. I moaned his name as I climaxed, and he replied, "What?" FML
Today, I had sex for the first time with a guy. After he passionately made love to me, I turned to him and said, "You smell really good." He turned to me and said, "You don't." FML
Today, as I was getting dressed after having sex with a guy I like, he told me I looked better with my clothes on. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML
Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML
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Top comments
Not_Impressed13 9
The important thing to remember is that you had an ****** face.
Ashamed_Sister 60
Maybe he can enjoy a Steve-Martin-face because he is secretly gay. At least your face reminds him of something good.
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Comments (70)
Ray_of_midnight 23
Comedy is not pretty....
BaronVonSteuben 5
bwahahahaha that sucks, but that's funny
Dmanrock29 1
Better Steve Martin than Steve Buscemi
Megan639 16
Well it's a little awkward but not a deal breaker...
dead_insects 18
look at the bright side: he made you cum
akstyle 3
He was giving you a Neg (an ambiguous statement or seemingly accidental insult with the intent of actively demonstrating a lack of interest in someone) you like from the book, The Game by Neil Strauss! It keeps you unsure with where you stand with him. It kind of like say, Wow those are some nice earrings you have there....They kind of remind me of the ones my grandma use to have! Did he just put me down or give me a compliment! Read the book it is great!
ardencred 7
Did you scream "Oklahoma Oklahoma Oklahoma Oklahoma"?
onorexveritas 24
he sounds like a nice guy
ZacZ 8
Steve Martin's a funny dude. Maybe you have a funny ******.
gradyolson 10
Next time you bone op look him dead in the face and say im just a wild and crazy guy. Classix SNL anyone.