Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, I tried faking an orgasm for the first time, because I thought it would be sexy for my boyfriend. He stopped to ask me if I was okay. I guess I'm not good at faking it. FML
Today, after having sex with my boyfriend for the first time, he told me he wanted to break up. He told me my orgasm face wasn't something he could put up with. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Just as he was about to finish, he pulled out and came in his hand. He then flicked his hand towards my face and yelled, "Sha-ZAM!" FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
jake98899889 4
Whatever gets the job done. Right?
grahambertus 11
Yeah. At least a zombie isn't shallow, he loves you for your brains.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (157)
jake98899889 4
Whatever gets the job done. Right?
k8izgr8_fml 0
is watching the walking dead like **** to you?;)
vturbz91 0
He must be really ugly if the thought of a zombie going down on you makes u cum when he can't do it
drawmesunshine 17
23, you must be really dumb if you think his appearance has anything to do with OP's newfound zombie fetish.
ICATiger 13
Most of taken a lot more moaning eh?
grahambertus 11
Yeah. At least a zombie isn't shallow, he loves you for your brains.
AnonymousTroll 2
So Halloween is more kinky now?
ScaughtieHolden 11
Most of what 28? You mean "must have"?
2wenty0ne21 0
You found the humor sexy not the zombie part right?
skullcandifiedDJ 5
I think the OP has a case of necrophilia if the thought of a FREAKING corpse turns her on...
tjv3 10
That's a little unsettling
Oh_Hayy_Its_Lex 10
necrophelia?
BostonBruinsFan 8
Once in a town of all woman, there was a male zombie attack. The zombies where rapers, and the woman didnt give a fight. They were too busy having their best orgasims ever. Thus, the zombie fetish was born.
ManWhatsoever 6
just out of curiosity !! What's it so sexy about zombie !!?
Akai_fml 4
Receive ****** from boyfriend <thisgirl.jpg> COMPLAIN ON FML
cinderella10383 6
Women, were and orgasams Yw :)
NoOneLovesYou 13
192, it's people like you who make me question whether or not calling out hypocrisy is even worth the effort.
sutianneli 13
Halloween was always kinda kinky... Wasn't it?
sens3sfailing 25
Necrophilia is having sex with something dead
Xx_Nikky_xX 4
whatever floats your boat.
chippedipp 0
Zombiefetisch is the shit?
CryMoreFMLs 15
Necrophilia!!
Wederoney 16
I get the feeling it's not you're boyfriends fault that he coulnd't give you an ****** in over a year of dating.
Rocker909 0
Water. Water floats my boat.
xaviiboo 9
110- Yea.. You know.... Considering he's alive & all.....
rnbz 0
Whatever cranks your tractor :D
minisquid 9
125, my tractor is an electric start.
israelnotjacob 20
I'm going to agree and also point out that it pisses me off when people always act like it is the guy's fault or that it means he's small or whatever. In the real world a lot of women have trouble reaching ****** during sex, whether the guy is doing his part or not. I'd say virtually all women can reach ****** if it's approached properly, but it's easier to find the way for some more than others.
cinderella10383 6
Who said anything about penetration? If you are getting oral sex performed on you and can't orgasam there is a big problem there!
superswagbro 7
Whatever sinks your sumarine
griffins33 4
Hey at least it worked!
McLovinBearJew 0
Yeah I fail to see a problem here
22cute 17
Ditto! I'm saying YDI because everyone deserves a good ******!! Congratulations!
noshatsherlockk 15
Doesn't matter, got head.
twaumat 28
yes, but worked unintentionally
deviable 9
Well, now you know what you like.
mbusey 20
It was probably the moaning.
Kayokku 1
I wish I had a weird fetish like that. xD Makes for a great conversation.
iliketurdles 7
Among the patients in the Psych ward..
CaptainPickles72 18
Psych Ward patients... how did you know my fetish!?
glittercookies 12
No. No it doesn't.
Kayokku 1
Yes it does, you blind hooker.
greekgal44 14
thats actually pretty hot haha
MullerMadness 0
Your pretty hot
quite_bored 9
Her pretty hot what?
murphdarkly 13
Yes it is
steven107 7
I don't get how that's hot?
IsMyWenieHard 0
Can I **** u?!?!
ballshardnigMC 2
U now watelse is pretty hot?....... U
JCJC15 0
Uhhh ..... Thats .. Odd
PElexander 5
Hi Angela! I'm a zombie btw. :)
resshead 0
There's worse fetishes out there, trust me.
Angel_Cacey 7
I don't think I'm even going to ask O.O
wheel4deal 5
I kind of want to know. But I'm scared of the answer.
BostonBruinsFan 8
One lady came only when she killed something
bizarre_ftw 22
Murderous furry excrement zombie fetish combo? That's worse, right? Throw in some **********, blood drinking, cutting, actual sadism, and pedophilia and you've got yourself a good reason to avoid sex for a few decades
drawmesunshine 17
141, you should sell that idea to whoever made The Human Centipede.
Isaac_The_Man 0
I love that movie.. But hate that movie at the same time.. Not really.. It's gross and creepy, with very bad acting
cmac86 24
I will trust you because God forbid I see something worse than this and have it burned into my brain permanently.
alexh15 13
The undead know what they are doing... :P
drawmesunshine 17
Your profile picture is perfect for this FML.
alexh15 13
Hells yeah! I think I'l take that as a compliment? :P
aubzdall 6
It could be worse. My best friend is insanely turned on by her college professors....and rocking chairs.
zack11742 7
That's is ... Awesome
CockAsian 14
Call me Professor CockAsian.
toastyumm 1
I bet it's all the moaning.
Lilpciak2012 2
that is awesome.