Today, we found out that my unborn sibling is a girl, and my parents quickly named her. In a few years' time, "Candida" is going to catch all kinds of shit at school, just like I do for being named Dorothy. My "friends" have already started calling me "Lil' yeast infection's sis." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after two rounds of antibiotics, I got a yeast infection. My husband started calling me "Yeasty." FML
Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML
Today, I realized my sister has a yeast infection. How, you ask? Her tube of yeast infection cream and my tube of toothpaste look remarkably similar. I'm still trying to get the taste out of my mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend referred to her yeast infection as "making bread." I can never look at bread the same way. FML
Today, I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with a yeast infection. It’s been 3 hours since I’ve been home and my husband won’t stop referring to me as "cheddar puss". FML
Today, I found out I'm going to have a sister. Who’s the mom gonna be? It’s my cousin from my mom’s side. My dad’s excuse? "Well, she ain’t blood related." FML
Today, while socializing after a church service, I discovered I'm still referred to as "Fireshit's brother", after an incident a year ago which involved my sister screaming "the devil is coming out of my anus!" from the lavatory. FML
Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML
Today, I found out that my sister's kids refer to me as their 'Drunkle'. I guess I have to admit to myself that I'm an alcoholic. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with polycystic ovaries and confided in my mom, after being told I would have trouble having kids. Five minutes later, I hear the whole family laughing about it downstairs. FML
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Top comments
ksktwin84 14
Show them a medical dictionary...with pictures
olpally 33
They really need to leave the ridiculous baby names for the celebrities. **** both your lives, hard. :( stupid parents. Those people are jerks also. :/
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Comments (165)
doglover100 29
I'd show them what it is.
laurieblue 1
uhmmm what else would your "unborn sister" be, other than a girl ???. .please enlighten me...
ihpp 22
I think I have to say f your unborn sisters life. By the way I actually think the name Dorothy is pretty.
Sputnikspak 13
Dorothy is a pretty normal name. It's my grandma's middle name. You can always go by Dora if you want. Or Thea. But Candida? Seriously?
lochiamochia 25
Dot is a pretty good nickname, too. Dorothy always reminds me of the Wizard of Oz. Every time I hear that name I just want to grab ToTo, clicked my red heels together and be whisked away by a tornado.
Sputnikspak 13
It does remind me of Oz, but that's not such a bad thing. It seems pretty much every kid will be teased for their name no matter what. I have one of the most boring whitebread names imaginable (Sarah) and I still got plenty of nonsense from asshole kids. 'Scarey Sarey' was one (I was, and still am, a rather timid individual). Kids can be jerks in general.
dmd316 9
My name is Dorothy, but I've always loved it because I was named after my grandmother who died before I was born. The only grief I ever got was over the Wizard of Oz, but that hasn't ever bothered me because I love the movie. I actually get compliments on my name frequently.
ElizabethNL93 20
I know it's just my opinion, but I can't seem to fathom why anyone would want to name a child that. There are some pretty "out-there" names, but that is just ugly.
skatoolaki 24
Because some people are ignorant. I once met a ****** (pronounced vuh-gina) and my Mom used to make cakes in our small town. Some folks called in and wanted Happy Birthday N*gga (pronounced ny-ja) for a toddler girl. They weren't joking and had NO idea what it truly spelled. Poor kid.
ElizabethNL93 20
I'd kill someone if my name was ******!
MrBoredomioo 18
What about the other dumbass parents on this site that named the kid Chlamydia
tukies 28
Maybe it's time to tell them kids get bullied big time over names. If they must name her after a yeast infection at least make it her middle name.
Rick_Astley_fml 14
Yep .... dumbass parents
MrPortalFan 21
What kind of parents name their kids after a yeast infection? That's worse than naming your kid "North"
gracehi 33
I actually like the name "North." It just sounds stupid when followed by the last name "West."
shorty6823 28
Nori would be a cute nickname for North.
Uscdrew1 7
My mom was seriously considering naming me "Stormy" and would have done so if my dad hadn't intervened.
glabberfasted 16
Stormy is actually pretty common for girls. I knew a few growing up.
lexisJO 11
73, my first daughter is going to be Stormy. I think it's such a pretty name.
vladimirnabokov 15
Stormy is a really common name in my family. I have an aunt named Stormy who named her daughter Stormy, and now she has a daughter named Stormy... I'm not exactly a fan of the name either, but it's a surprisingly common name.
Krbsmommy 8
My names Stormye and I love it!
gracehi 33
What's wrong with the name "Dorothy?"
yesthisischarlie 8
How does being named "Dorothy" gets you bullied? This is the most ordinary name, it's in my language too. I'm asking seriously, English is my second language, so maybe I don't get something obvious?
skyeyez9 25
Most people probably associate it as an "old lady's name" and OP is likely a teen. Its the equivalent to seeing a little boy named Herbert. Which sounds like an old man name.
dmd316 9
My name is Dorothy, and the only thing people would ever joke about is The Wizard of Oz. Otherwise, most people love my name.
ohSNAPyall 27
What's wrong with Dorothy? Lots of 'Wizard of Oz' jokes?
dmd316 9
If the worst thing someone can come up with about a name is joking about a classic movie, it isn't a bad name. As a Dorothy myself, I've always embraced the Wizard of Oz jokes.