Today, I found out that my sister's kids refer to me as their 'Drunkle'. I guess I have to admit to myself that I'm an alcoholic. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
We need to talk
Today, my parents staged a family intervention and gave me the grandest bollocking I've ever experienced in all my 22 years of life. They did this because my sister showed them a photo of me jokingly posing with three bottles of Bud Light at a party. Apparently, I'm an alcoholic in denial. FML
Today, I decided it was time to tell my daughter that she had been adopted. Not only had she known for 5 years, she found out from my drunk sister. FML
Today, my fiancé came home drunk with some girl. Then he told her that I was his sister. FML
Today, my drunk sister threw up on me while I was sleeping. FML
Today, at dinner, I accidentally let it slip that I'd taken a small sip of alcohol a few years ago and hated it. My extremely strict parents are now trying to get me into rehab. FML
Today, I found out that even though my sister and I are identical twins, I'm known as "The ugly one". FML
Snitches get stiches
Today, my ten year-old son realized something. Beer is alcohol. People who drink a lot of alcohol are alcoholics. Therefore, I'm an alcoholic for drinking beer with dinner. He told everyone at his conservative private school and they tried to have an intervention. They pray for me every day. FML
Today, I found out I was an alcoholic. Not from my friends or family, but because the ice-maker couldn't keep up with the amount of drinks I've been making. FML
Today, while I was studying for an exam, my younger sister came home extremely drunk and threw up all over herself and her bed. I later got grounded for not setting a better example. FML
Poor choice of words
Today, I got drunk and tried to talk with my crush. I ended up telling her that she reminded me of my nieces. FML
Top comments
FYLTHOUGH 15
the first step to recovery is understanding that there is a problem there
WittyMoron 22
At least you're admitting it
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (77)
WittyMoron 22
At least you're admitting it
UserError94 18
At least you're admitting it
hellobobismyname 24
There seems to be an echo in here. Let's see.. Hellooo!?
trenteg11 13
....... hello........
ballinball 14
It's me
ewildawe 9
I've been wondering if after all these years you'd like to meet...
fanman730 13
LMAO
FYLTHOUGH 15
the first step to recovery is understanding that there is a problem there
hardcorefan16 22
Well now that you know, you gotta fix it.
MikaykayUnicorn 36
I agree. Please get help. My uncle was an alcoholic and it killed him. You don't realize how bad it will mess up the people you love.
CynicallyAlive 13
You're only an alcoholic if you depend on alcohol to function. You might just be a worthless drunk. There's a difference!
fakedsincerity 32
hahah addiction is so funny. don't be an asshole.
CynicallyAlive 13
I'm well aware addiction isn't funny. I've had to deal with its consequences more than most. But that shouldn't stop me from making light of it. This website is dedicated to humor, to taking these bad situations in life and being able to laugh at them. Sometimes humor is the only way we can deal with how horrible life can be. I'm sorry if I misjudged this but I don't think it warrants a personal insult. Maybe I'm wrong.
Bloodmorphed 7
i actually think you are right. people get butt hurt over some stupid things. now there are times humor isn't the way to do go but this isn't one of those times
Waxwell 21
When someone is admitting they are addicted to ancho it's a very serious moment and not one to make light of
fakedsincerity 32
Even if it is some on jokey website if someone is on the cusp of seeking help for an addiction a little cheap "joke" might push them back into denial/ hiding out of shame. Addiction is still badly stigmatised. Even being 6+ years clean if i tell someone of my past they treat me like a filthy addict/a big joke. #33: Although I'm sure you meant no harm its still an assholey thing to do, in my opinion. we're both welcome to our opinions. (:
HylianBadger 21
This is why we can't have nice things. People are way too sensitive over a silly joke. Maybe that's why you're unhappy, and we aren't.
musoboy 22
@44: If your friends are making you a joke because of your distant past, which you've left behind you, you need to reevaluate your friends.
fakedsincerity 32
#50. That's one of the reasons I now have very few friends I trust. :P There are lots of good people who won't judge but just as many who will use it against you. Idk. I'd rather err on the side of being "too sensitive" than needlessly kick someone when they're down. ¯_(ツ)_/¯ ps. #48; I'm very happy despite my problems - just offered my perspective. Take it or leave it, bro.
HylianBadger 21
Your words say one thing, your tone says another. Not everyone handles things the same way, so there's no reason to tell someone that they are wrong with how they do so.
fakedsincerity 32
I didn't know you were the tone police. I use the word asshole all the time casually. I'm an asshole, you're an asshole. Whatever. For someone saying people get "too sensitive" easily you're getting sensitive about my little opinion.
HylianBadger 21
I don't take offense from people who have made no influence in my life, so don't worry about it. I will continue living my life and you will continue yours. That's the only thing we can do until we die, really.
Laphog 17
I'd rather be druncle than " uncle tickles "
Steve97 32
You'll still be the weird uncle in the family dude...
gamermonster 34
Or "late night uncle"
allforfun 23
Haha I've never heard anyone else say that, for the last 20 years I've been convinced my friend made that up in jr. High.
Laphog 17
"Uncle diddles" has a similar effect. Not sure who coined the term , but I know Dane cook loves the phrase lol
deathrise007 22
At least you know you have a problem.
teentee401 37
He's so drunk, he didn't even spell "Druncle" right in his username.
Miss_Whipped 43
If you are going to drink, don't do it around children.
Shay_Shay97 23
Hey man, at least you have the balls to admit you have a problem in the first place. That's more than a lot of people can say. Chin up, I'm sure you'll get through it.
abhig 14
First thing about finding a solution to a problem is recognizing that there is a problem !! Good job on that. I hope u will get out of it ! All the best
trucker2 33
Half the battle is admitting it to yourself.....you've made it this fall op.... Continue
expertsmilee 26
But it's spring
thisguy22 33
Not everywhere.
trucker2 33
Far- damn auto correct!!!!
expertsmilee 26
>;}