Today, I walked in on my mom giving my dad head. Acting like I hadn't seen anything, I asked if I could use a towel sitting on the dresser. My mom said, "No, we're going to need that one." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I needed to ask my mom for something, so I went to her room without knocking and walked in on her and her boyfriend fucking. FML
Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom in the bathroom, washing a dildo. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom blow-drying my grinning dad's pubes. FML
Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML
Today, I walked in on my Mum and Dad having sex and didn't even realize what they were doing until she shouted at him to go harder. FML
Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML
Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
You should have swiped the towel and ran away yelling, "Swallow, bitch!" Also, your dad must be hung like a flea for your mom not to say, "Naw, wah wah (gag) wah wah wah."
dudette2 9
How did you act like you didn't notice? How does that even work? "Hi Mom, Hi Dad, I'm not noticing your hard on in my mothers mouth 'cause I'm too busy looking for a towel" What??
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Comments (77)
hybrid93 0
I presume from this that when OP entered Mum and Dad immediately stopped what they were doing. Therefore explaining why OP stuck around and why Mum could talk to OP. If not, WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST LEAVE?!
6point02 0
you're a jackass for sticking around.
Disastrous 0
Your "Swallow, bitch!" comment made my day
tondog2121 0
if I saw that **** it I'm gone! how do you act like you didn't notice?
xITZxTuRtLeX 0
u should have of put on ur ninja costume and threw a flash gernade at them and got the towel,common sense dude its that easy duh.
xITZxTuRtLeX 0
throw a flash grenade at them,and take it,that simple.
Felecorr 0
FYDad's life cause your mom doesnt swallow. (Someone said this, repeating it. :D) But Your mom is awesome cause she blows the whistle.
FlonkertonChamp 6
YDI for A: not knocking, and B: STICKING AROUND.
ThankfullyNotYou 1
I can't believe you stayed in the room after seeing that. What is with children and their parents talking and watching each others sex lives? It's so disturbing. I would have run the hell out of there and gagging the whole way. Shame on your parents for not teaching you to knock before entering closed doors.
BeanieBGone 6
One should not linger and ask questions.
BostonBruinsFan 8
That's what a warped wise man once said...and now a wise woman...