Today, I had my daughter babysit her two-year-old brother while I went out with my husband. I told her not to let him out of her sight. She certainly did as I said; when I tuned into our internet-enabled baby monitor, I heard her and some guy having sex in the room. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my brother babysat for me. He invited his girlfriend around without me knowing, and they were all playing hide and seek together. While he and his girl were hiding, they decided to have a quickie. My three year old found them and saw everything. She won't stop copying their sex noises. FML
Today, I had some hot phone sex with my long-distance girlfriend. Half-way through, my mom stormed in, and told me I was disgusting and sick for doing it in the same room as my brother. I forgot about the baby monitor. FML
Today, I was babysitting my friend's 12-year-old son while his dad was having an emergency procedure at the hospital. I walked into the den to see if he wanted to go out to dinner, only to find him watching Pornhub on my iPad. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was the first time in four months since our baby was born, that I could really enjoy it. After we finished up we walked into the livingroom, where my white faced brother was sitting. He said we left the baby monitor on. FML
Today, being a divorced dad, I had a very important job opportunity for which I would be gone overnight. When I returned, I found my son locked in his room while the babysitter was having sex with a man in my bed. FML
Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try cybersex, because we rarely see each other these days. We only used text. Halfway through, I noticed that she started being more demanding. As it turns out, my girlfriend had left the room and her older brother had walked in and taken over. FML
Today, I enjoyed a romantic evening at home with my husband while a babysitter took care of my 5-year-old daughter. After she came home, she told me the sitter let her use her "weird swing." I wasn't too worried, until she said it was indoors, and I realized she was describing a sex swing. FML
Today, I was babysitting for my mom's coworkers two little boys. they went to bed around 9 and I was watching a movie on HBO. I fell asleep before the movie was over. I woke up to the parents walking into the house. I looked at the TV, and porn was on. FML
Today, after much debate, my husband convinced me to let his scumbag brother babysit our seven-year-old son while we went out to a restaurant. When we got home, we found him teaching our son how to pick the lock to our liquor cabinet. My husband is unapologetic. FML
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Top comments
ShirtlessWonder 17
How can someone not care about their sibling that much?
ratchel_7 8
I hope she's being punished
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Comments (113)
militarybrat 21
No no no NOT ok. A 2 year old is very impressionable.
mandaa95 17
At least she didn't leave the room
MRSwick2525 23
At least she didn't leave the room??? That's your response? Typical teenager's answer. She was ******* her boyfriend in front of her 2yr old brother!! But hey, at least she didn't leave the room. Jesus Christ, think about your responses before you reply. A 2yr old child is extremely impressionable and believe it or not kiddo, can remember things that happen at that age!!!!
aikhan 16
Maybe she was just praying.
ezrajab 22
Sounds like you need to have a serious talk with her about trust and how important that is
SPN_lover666 27
#57, The FML says that she technically did keep her brother in her sight all the while the parents were gone . That means he was in the same room when she and the guy were having sex.
tw124331 13
Fail, I think you took the joke a little too far "Jiggly". Better luck on that next time!
NostalgiaFreak9 43
I hope you have her severe punishments.
jryan2 16
That will be a funny revenge story "hey sis remember when you were babysitting me but said **** it and ****** your boyfriend? Bet you wish you didn't now.
nrwl_30 17
Ummm... You're fired!? Lol
fmljosh1015 20
How old is she