Today, I found my pitbull after three weeks of frantic searching. When we returned home, I put out food and water for him. I went to get him and found him in my room, wagging his tail at me. He'd peed on my comforter, freshly folded clothes, and new 60-dollar winter coat. Welcome home, Caine. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML
Today, my dog ran away. I looked for him for 5 hours, and when I came back home, he was waiting for me at the door. FML
Today, I found the dog I lost while I was dog sitting. It was with its new adoptive family. FML
Today, my dog disappeared for an hour. After I'd called her name repeatedly, she crawled out from under my bed, threw up on my feet, and then happily walked out the room. FML
Today, I got back from a two-week holiday only to discover my dog missing. After looking for him at animal shelters and putting up missing pet signs, my roommate admitted he lost him in a game of drunk poker. FML
Today, I got home from work and found my dog missing. When I asked my neighbor if she saw what happened, I saw my dog sleeping on her couch. She tried to say it was hers. FML
Today, I searched our neighborhood for our lost dog. After screaming at the top of our lungs, driving around in circles, and asking strangers, we realized we took him to the groomers this morning. FML
Today, coming home, I discovered that my dog had left me a beautiful mound of poop in the middle of the corridor. He'd made an effort, though: there was a roll of shredded toilet paper next to it. FML
Today, a dog came up to me while I was sitting on my porch. I used my belt as a leash to go try to find its owner. After an hour of looking in the rain, I gave up and let it go. Now I'm back in my house and it won't stop pawing and barking at my door. It's 3:00 a.m. FML
Today, my 97-pound pitbull wagged and chased his tail while I was being mugged. FML
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Top comments
_Athena_ 10
So...put them in the washing machine? It's not like he destroyed some priceless original painting you had at your house or anything. He peed on some of your stuff; something that's completely and easily fixable. At least you got your dog back.
cristy91 33
Pit bulls aren't bad dogs. It depends on how you raise them. Obviously if you raise a dog to fight (which is what most people assume all pit bull owners do with them) then yes, they are mean. Most owners DO NOT do that though. If you raise them right, they are sweet dogs. Just because the media portrays them as horrible killers does not mean they are. Also, I know many people who own that type of dog, so I'm not speaking jibberish.
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Comments (122)
bleedingglitter 24
Dogs are stupid and pee on shit when nervous/excited. I'd be really pissed but I'm not a dog lover.
bonbon1559 20
WHY IS YOUR USERNAME DOGLESS
NewJoker755 15
Lol... 60 bucks vs mans best friend