Poker face
Today, I got back from a two-week holiday only to discover my dog missing. After looking for him at animal shelters and putting up missing pet signs, my roommate admitted he lost him in a game of drunk poker. FML
Today, I got back from a two-week holiday only to discover my dog missing. After looking for him at animal shelters and putting up missing pet signs, my roommate admitted he lost him in a game of drunk poker. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got home from work and found my dog missing. When I asked my neighbor if she saw what happened, I saw my dog sleeping on her couch. She tried to say it was hers. FML
Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML
Today, I bought a dog to make me feel less lonely. He ran away. FML
Today, my roommate asked me for help finding her wallet because it’s been lost for days. I helped a bit, but it never turned up. I left to go to my boyfriend’s house as I'd planned. Guess whose wallet I found laying on the ground next to his night-stand? And why it was there… FML
Today, my dog ran away. I looked for him for 5 hours, and when I came back home, he was waiting for me at the door. FML
Today, I searched our neighborhood for our lost dog. After screaming at the top of our lungs, driving around in circles, and asking strangers, we realized we took him to the groomers this morning. FML
Today, I lost my dog and so I put up 'lost' signs. As I was coming back home I noticed one had been written on. It said: "Found your dog. Keeping it". FML
Today, my dog ran away. Luckily my neighbors caught him before he got too far. Now they won't give him back because they think I did something to him to make him want to run away. FML
Today, my dog disappeared for an hour. After I'd called her name repeatedly, she crawled out from under my bed, threw up on my feet, and then happily walked out the room. FML
Today, I returned from a week-long vacation. My landlord told me he had let my boyfriend in my apartment to get something. I don't have a boyfriend. Everything in my apartment is gone. FML
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Top comments
gravedigger08 0
you can actually get a court order to get the dog back since you never gave permission and it's free just go down to the courthouse then kick ur roommate out and get another roommate
jachelle 0
Wtfff, who bets a dog?
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Comments (99)
jjpavo 0
fail...
kyarush 10
ya I lost my dignity in a game of poker once... never again. FML. FYL. F all of our lives lol
Stupified 0
Hahaha why don't you play to get him back
marinus_fml 20
it could have been worse! you could have come back from your 2 week holiday, and when you went to see your girlfriend, you could have finished in 10 seconds since you hadn't seen her in a while..
Freeze_fml 17
Every single thing that has ever happened in the universe could have been worse. Shut the hell up and put a damn shirt on.
phreshboi 1
ROFL sucks for you OP but hopefully you weren't mentally attached to it.
uhazsquiads 0
lol 5 OP, that really sucks :'( if someone lost my dog I would go get it and If I couldn't I would kill whoever lost it in poker e_e
TehPiGuy 0
11 well said :D
nishant5456 0
I think your roommate has the disease called Drunk Idiot who Fails.
Stupified 0
1) Search on craiglist for free dog. 2) Trade dog for your dog or keep the dog you like best 3) Buy a gun 4) Shoot your roommate or his dog if he has one 5) Eat a taco. 6) ??? 7) Profit! Ydi for having a dog.
daltreix 3
oh no poor dog. dogs are badass! screw cats! lol
twinny_sc 13
How about you get a new dog and roommate.
RainbowBitch15 11
8: lol 11: love ur pic. flcl is amazing. OP: I'd be gettin a new roommate AFTER I got my dog back! fyl.
happy_dino 6
OMG!!!! THAT IS SOOOOO SAD!!!!! I'd kick their ass!!! :(. Sorry OP...
bonsaiboy26 1
lol 10 sec no excuse
Evee359 0
get new friends
Icecube32 0
oh shit son that sucks
degrassilovur 0
hahahahahahahahahahahahhh(:
MykeLytorus 0
It's funny because it could have been worse and it's moist. Nobody is born gay--it's a choice just like what clothes you wear! FTW!! Dur dur dur I'm cool coz I come one here and comment on every single FML.
kocoman500 2
number 8 (marinus)- your an idiot. nothing could be more worse than losing your dog- no no no, your ROOMMATE losing your dog in a game on drunk poker. stop saying "it could be a lot worse". yes, we all know it could be in some cases, but you don't have to announce it.
Elenachka 0
this paragraph makes me really angry :( not even the grammar Nazis will touch it...
ZleveL 0
I lost my foreskin in a game of poker :(
gozar_fml 1
I think I'm going to have some tshirts made that say "Your an idiot".
justsayfuck 5
#64, it is part of the joke you wrote 'you're' wrong, right? :/
SweetLikeDirt 0
Mentally?? That's like some esp shit. I think you mean emotionally attached?
Christopher08 0
ha ha ha I supose that happen to you
athletichic2012 0
omg that's terrible! I'm sooo sorryy =[
Uncle_Moe_Lester 3
8 i bet u did that before
ZombieLoveA 0
Ray William Johnson :D
ZombieLoveA 0
My last comment was towards 13 because he or she likes ray William Johnson as much as I do.
Mpsteve13 7
first again!
ZachMitch1994 0
Fail !!
houseofame 4
Sorry I won the game! Your dog is sitting on my lap :D
darkmis1 18
Awww! I lost the game :-(
xxjoseph1543xx 0
YDI for forgetting to lock his chain today.
rileykins 0
hahah. play a game of poker with gay guys and bet his body.
jachelle 0
Wtfff, who bets a dog?
sammiller4 3
obviously his roommate bets dogs lol :p
I_have_no_clue 0
Sounds like they could read his poker face.
Flutist 3
Just dance, you don't have to pick up dog poo anymore.
skatingalyy 0
when life hands u a bad romance, put on ur poker face, pick up ur telephone, call alejandro, and just dance :)
Poepiepiesie 3
Get drunk and poker with your friend for his car keys , as he plays with everything.
AyeItsMobleyy 0
"get drunk and poker with your friend.." nicely typed.
KaitlynxD 5
Wow, that's terrible. I hope there's a way to get him back!