Today, I showed up to my Bumble date with a guy. He looked at me up and down and said, "You look different from the pictures. I pictured you more slimmer." To rub salt in the wound, he proclaimed, "I’d rather staple my nutsack than continue this date. Good luck to you," and walked off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my Bumble date. I was so excited because it’s my first date in 6 years. We exchanged hellos and he said he needed to use the restroom. Turns out he left. When I messaged him to ask what happened, he told me, “I agreed to go on a date with the hot girl in the photos, not a contestant from 'My 600lb Life'.” FML
Today, my Tinder date took one look at me and left, because, "the camera" made me "look thick" and he, "can’t date a skinny bitch." FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a restaurant. My date took one look at me and said pityingly, "Stuffed your bra, didn't ya? Seriously, why even bother?" The douche then started trying to lecture me on "false advertising". FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I've been talking to online for weeks. Unfortunately, it turns out they'd used old photos and misrepresented themselves, and I didn't find them attractive at all. Even I'm not that desperate. We ended up having an awkward dinner and I couldn't wait for it to be over. FML
Today, my Tinder date said it wasn’t gonna work, all because, I “need to lose some extra pounds.” Last week, I'd had another Tinder date and he told me he’d continue seeing me if I dropped at least 30 pounds. I think I get the hint now. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. When I arrived, the guy looked nothing like his profile picture. We started chatting, and things were going fine until he asked, “So, what do you think about my date?” I replied, “Uh, I think it’s going well!” He responded, “I was talking about the waitress. I’m married.” FML
Today, I went on a blind date. The guy greeted me with a "What's up, bitch?", which I wrote off as him just being really laid-back. By dessert, he'd asked me if my boobs are real, then when we finished, asked how many more dates it'd take before I put out. So much for that. FML
Today, I met up with a guy from a local dating site for coffee. He walked up, looked me over and said "Ummm, no", then walked off. FML
Today, I met a blind date from a dating app. He looked nothing like his pictures, but I tried to be polite. I said, “Wow, you look different in person!” He smiled and said, “That’s not me. He’s probably just running late, and I’m just sitting here.” FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for ages. Midway through the meal, he sighed and said, "I'll be honest, this is a horrible date. You got zero personality and I'm too lazy to do a window escape, so..." He then got up and walked out. FML
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Top comments
Bogrbon 27
Well, it also depends on how far off your photos were from reality. I can’t judge without seeing them and you, but If they were from pre-COVID when you were 30lbs lighter plus at a Facebook, you’re kind of asking for a negative response in person. It’s like the men who post they’re 5”11’ but are really 5’5” then act surprised. A lot of people fudge their profile a little, many fudge it a LOT! People discriminate based off superficial stuff, and while lying to people about it in your profile may get you more dates, it won’t be with people who will accept you the way you are, and they’ll immediately dislike you for feeling like you lied to them. He didn’t have to be such a dick about it though, so you dodged a bullet there.
cuz803 46
You dodged a bullet. Don't worry. That prick has his own insecurities and downfalls that will be exploited and called out for. Accept your perfect imperfections and don't let some asswipe judge you. Feel proud of yourself, OP.
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Comments (7)
cuz803 46
You dodged a bullet. Don't worry. That prick has his own insecurities and downfalls that will be exploited and called out for. Accept your perfect imperfections and don't let some asswipe judge you. Feel proud of yourself, OP.
Bogrbon 27
Well, it also depends on how far off your photos were from reality. I can’t judge without seeing them and you, but If they were from pre-COVID when you were 30lbs lighter plus at a Facebook, you’re kind of asking for a negative response in person. It’s like the men who post they’re 5”11’ but are really 5’5” then act surprised. A lot of people fudge their profile a little, many fudge it a LOT! People discriminate based off superficial stuff, and while lying to people about it in your profile may get you more dates, it won’t be with people who will accept you the way you are, and they’ll immediately dislike you for feeling like you lied to them. He didn’t have to be such a dick about it though, so you dodged a bullet there.
hope jm 5
he most likely would have been a horrible date if it had continued. dodged a bullet. good luck on future endeavors.
Brightside86 31
Reminds me of this social experiment on youtube where this girl showed up in a fat suit with fat face makeup on and every one of the guys bailed when they saw that they'd essentially been catfished. Seems kind of dumb but not having accurate/recent photos is a pretty common initial deal breaker. I get it though, last time I built a dating profile with good pics and stuff was 8 years ago. While I feel I look similar I'm confident, if I used them, anyone I date would at least notice that things don't quite sync up.
WVYankee 17
**** him and his attitude. You are you and deserve better.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
That's when you whip out a stapler you had in your purse and say, "Congratulations, you're going to get both tonight!"
bobsanction 18
This is why you should use honest photos when online dating