Today, I got a text message while driving home. I checked after arriving, and found it was a kinky text from my boyfriend, so I sent him an even kinkier reply. He later raged at me, because I somehow should have known he was showing off his phone to his mom when I sent my reply. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sent a kinky text message to my boyfriend. Within minutes I got a reply of, "Whoever this is, fuck off and give my girlfriend's phone back." Apparently I'm so bad at writing sexy messages that my boyfriend thought it was a prank from someone who'd stolen my phone. FML
Today, I sent a romantic, flirty text to my boyfriend. A few minutes later, I got a reply from… my mom, saying, “I don’t think this was meant for me, but thanks for making my day awkward.” FML
Today, as I was driving my dad home, I got a text message. My dad, who doesn't want me texting while I'm driving, decided to read the text message to me. He began to repeat a message from my boyfriend recounting the amazing sex we had the night before. FML
Today, I thought it would be hot if I sent my boyfriend kinky message. He didn't reply so I sent a few more. 10 minutes later I got a reply saying, "Honey, this is his mom and you should be a little less desperate." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were talking on the phone, and things got a little heated. We were in the middle of some kinky dialog, complete with hand action when he suddenly goes silent. While waiting for a response, I heard typing on the other end. He was checking his email. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was inside me, he got a text message. He actually stopped thrusting to reply. FML
Today, I was unbelievably horny so I sent a kinky text message to a boy I really like, only to receive the reply, "Not tonight, I'm raging Minecraft, having a wank, and going to sleep. Try again tomorrow." FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it was a good show of etiquette to answer a text message from his ex, while he was still inside me. FML
Today, I confronted my boyfriend after he received a text with a bunch of hearts on it. After arguing, turns out it was from me. FML
Today, I was sexting my boss. I realised that I wasn't texting my boyfriend after I'd sent 2 nudes, and received many sexually provocative responses. FML
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Top comments
TrinityisLife 22
So you forgot your crystal ball, too, huh? Don't you hate when that happens?
Cristoforo 17
You could have turned his logic back at him and raged at him for should of knowing that you were driving when he sent that text, unsafe. (Again, I know that doesn't make sense but neither does his logic)
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Comments (73)
ozpunker 20
What was the reply?
Chromax 8
"I want to hold your hand so hard."
VeganVampyre 27
Just not in public- that'll get you dumped.
krizzle97 2
Wow, woman logic from your boyfriend. Quick, now's your chance to validate your own!
bbambastic 16
That, kids, is why you don't text ad drive
Enslaved 38
She checked her messages AFTER she arrived home, not while she was driving. :P
CharresBarkrey 16
This, kids, is why you make sure you actually read through the whole FML before commenting.
bbambastic 16
And
ironichalibut 24
And.. There's a character limit to FMLs, so that's all you get
rivaraven 35
I think he/she means that it's not a big deal that she saw the text in his/her opinion
TheMathMajor 26
... No he's correcting his previous comment that had a typo.
rivaraven 35
In that case he failed.
kat33_fml 7
Next time don't text and drive. I don't want to be the person or know the person you end up hitting and killing because you can't be bothered to not text for 5 minutes.
Schiffy 18
"I checked after arriving" It can't be THAT hard to read 4 simple words.
kat33_fml 7
Fine I apologize I saw texting and driving and got angry. I almost lost my best friend because of an asshole texting and driving so I didn't read as carefully as I should have.
Iknoweverything 29
Being angry is no excuse for not being careful and jumping to conclusions. Your reason isn't even justified, since OP did NOT text and drive. Sheesh hope you aren't like that in conversation.
InsanishDanish 10
except she didn't text and drive...she said she checked the text after arriving home.
jmcr 27
Because girls are supposed to know what their bfs are up to 24/7 just so they can know the next time hes horny and free Geez drama queen much? Though his anger is prob mostly from embarrassment i know id be horrified if my bf sent me a dirty txt while my parents are looking at my phone
mr_sarcastic416 29
don't send him any kinky/sexy texts again...ever, under any circumstance.... tell him "just in case your mom is looking at your phone"
worldclassrager 41
Why would he show his mom a kinky text he is sending you..,that's for personal talk only...
poulkrebs 20
Reading AND comprehending is hard :-)
tonnie_soms 5
Can't wait to see the boyfriend's FML