Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while at work, my boss asked me to clean the bathroom. Someone had pooped on the floor and I stepped in it, dropping my manager's keys into the toilet. I then had to clean up my shoe and the floor, and put my hand in the toilet to get the keys. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML
Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML
Today, I went to take a dump at work, but the last person in the stall didn't flush. As I flushed for him, the shitty water splashed on my face. Some went in my mouth. FML
Today, not only did I shit myself on my way to work, I left my house keys in the bathroom after I cleaned up. It's $90 to replace them. FML
Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML
Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML
Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML
Today, I had to flush someone else's shit in the public washroom at work. It was so vile, I didn't want to get anywhere near it, so flushed it with my foot, only for it to slip off the handle and into the toilet. FML
Today, at work, an old lady dropped her lipstick into the ladies' room toilet, which is out of order and won't flush. I had to reach in and pull it out amid human waste. She thanked me, then uncapped it, and put some on her lips. FML
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Top comments
LadyClarik 8
At least it wasn't written in shit....
robc32ca 4
reach in and grab you can always wash your hands
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Comments (147)
grapist 0
dung?
breaka_1001 1
you shouldn't have been such a chicken shit and gotten your own keys out of the toilet. obviously they were visible.
SleepOnStones 5
That is perhaps the funniest thing I have ever heard of happening to someone. "Shit happens." Lmfao, that is great!!!
GawZ 0
Fortunately I have an arm and a hand with fingers to pick things up with. Yeah toilet water is gross but all the bathrooms I use have running water and soap to clean up with. So in conclusion, OP either has an unfortunate physical disability or uses a ghetto ass bathroom with no sink. Game, set, match yo.
BennyBear 0
that was just shitty of them to do that.
BennyBear 0
that was just shitty of them to do that.
snafu63 0
why Not reach in yourself? wash your hands after, this never would have happened to a guy.
sissylala7 0
why didn't you take them out before someone shit in there??
carlosestrada1 4
can't handle that much win
NickNack675 2
at least she was funny about it