Free Parking!
Today, I took the last parking spot in a crowded lot, got out feeling victorious, then immediately stepped in a puddle deep enough to soak my foot all the way through to my sock. FML
Today, I took the last parking spot in a crowded lot, got out feeling victorious, then immediately stepped in a puddle deep enough to soak my foot all the way through to my sock. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found a diaper in the parking lot. It's been raining all morning. This was the wrong day to wear flip-flops. FML
Today, I went to change my socks after I stepped in a puddle of water. As I walked out of my bedroom with a fresh pair of socks, I stepped in the puddle again. Three times. That's four pairs of socks ruined. God, I'm such a dumbass sometimes. FML
Today, I was leaving work after a storm. They're building some new offices outside, so I had to walk on an uneven path near the construction zone. I came to a big puddle and tried to jump across to what I thought was a piece of asphalt. It was mud. I slipped and fell backwards into the puddle. FML
Today, it's raining pretty hard and there are a bunch of puddles everywhere. I’m in a full rain suit and great boots, so instead of walking around the puddles, I decided to walk through the biggest one, only to drop down 4 feet, all because the city didn’t cover up a massive manhole. FML
Today, I was walking to work when it was starting to pour down sideways. I was pretty early anyway, so, I decided to duck into a bus shelter and let it pass. Suddenly, a big truck comes and drenched me with the biggest puddle. Soaking from head to toe. FML
Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML
Today, I woke up late and rushed to catch the bus. I sprinted heroically, slipped on wet pavement, and skidded directly into a puddle deep enough to baptize me. The driver waited just long enough to make eye contact before closing the doors and leaving. FML
Today, I rushed home during a torrential downpour. When I got back, I went to take a pee and took off my wet socks while I had the chance. Once I finished, I stood up with used toilet paper in one hand and wet socks in the other. Guess which I tossed into the toilet. FML
Today, I managed to run over my own foot with my own car. FML
Today, I finally found a parking space directly outside my apartment after driving around for 20 minutes. I celebrated, parked, and walked upstairs. Ten minutes later, I realized I'd left my car running with the keys still inside. FML
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