Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while at work, my boss asked me to clean the bathroom. Someone had pooped on the floor and I stepped in it, dropping my manager's keys into the toilet. I then had to clean up my shoe and the floor, and put my hand in the toilet to get the keys. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML
Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML
Today, I went to take a dump at work, but the last person in the stall didn't flush. As I flushed for him, the shitty water splashed on my face. Some went in my mouth. FML
Today, not only did I shit myself on my way to work, I left my house keys in the bathroom after I cleaned up. It's $90 to replace them. FML
Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML
Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML
Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML
Today, I had to flush someone else's shit in the public washroom at work. It was so vile, I didn't want to get anywhere near it, so flushed it with my foot, only for it to slip off the handle and into the toilet. FML
Today, at work, an old lady dropped her lipstick into the ladies' room toilet, which is out of order and won't flush. I had to reach in and pull it out amid human waste. She thanked me, then uncapped it, and put some on her lips. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
LadyClarik 8
At least it wasn't written in shit....
robc32ca 4
reach in and grab you can always wash your hands
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (147)
xxrachel2076xx 0
now dats hot !!!
Southpaw7391 3
I'm confused, you drop your keys, you go to "find something to fish them out" but in the meantime someone not only has time to poop but also had time to write in lipstick none the less a message to you, my point is if your work is that big where it took you that long to find something that it gave presumably this women to do this .... you'd think there would be more bathrooms or at least more then 1 stall.....
jpretz 1
it's just easier to call u stupid
SirObvious 1
(59) I'm more confused about how your confused about how he's confused.
mrtoby 0
They probably picked that stall on purpose to be an asshole though.
619warrior281 5
And shit, in fact, did happen..
textwork 4
you gotta admit they were clever with it
kanfwa88 0
LMAO just made my day!!
MrSStrupe514 0
Did u have to clean up the lipstick after u got ur keys back out. That would truly suck!
Rainbow_dumpster 28
No offense, OP. But you kinda deserve it. Why didn't you brave it and just grab the keys out of the toilet? Instead of just leaving the bathroom to find an object to fish them out, you could have gotten them out while it was clean and before somebody used it. You can always wash your hands, OP.
natepy 0
you grimmeyy
daAce77 8
5 your sooo funny haha (sarcastic laugh)
BarbieGirl1671 0
well that's a shitty situation...
scs90 0
lyin ass