Today, my 2 year-old son decided to pee on the dog for the second day in a row. I'm afraid this will turn into a routine thing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized that my 3 year-old son, who is being potty trained, has better aim standing up to pee than his 30 year-old father. FML
Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML
Today, I was with my 3 year-old son in the doctor's office. During the exam, he informed the doctor that he doesn't sleep in mommy's bed anymore because mommy sleeps in her underwear and farts all night long. FML
Today, I took the dog for a 45 minute walk/jog. She sniffed everything on the ground like she always does. She marked her territory twice, then we finally got home. As soon as I took her off the leash inside, she ran to the kitchen and took a dump right on the kitchen mat. FML
Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, my 5-year-old son made a drawing of our living room, with the addition of an apparition, and the text, "I can see you. Daddy doesn't see you. Who are you?" FML
Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML
Today, I found out that my neighbor's son is supposed to be giving me gas money for driving him to school each morning. He's using it to buy drugs instead. FML
Today, I've been babysitting a 4 month-old for two days. This has made a great impression on my cat, because now I can't sit down without him jumping up and licking my face until I pat his butt and rock him like the baby. FML
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Top comments
BoredomKillsinc 0
i hope the dog learns to defend itself and bite off the kids little weiner...
omgshaylaaa 0
awe it's your job to train your kid haha poor dog :(
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Comments (114)
FYLDeep 26
MUST RESIST URGE TO ARRGGHH... That must have pissed you off. Ah shit.
underguarded 20
Omg I love you. xD
starrs_movingIn 0
whoop your kids ass. like duhh. -__-
unfortunate_13 5
indeed. just teach him he can't do that. what's wrong with parents these days?
dlas 5
territorial domain is importaint amongst the alfa males hahaha
ohthebloodygore 16
3, 16, do any of you have kids? You can't exactly just say 'Don't do that!' and they never do it again. The two year old probably finds/found it hilarious and sees nothing wrong with it. My son used to throw his shoes at people and found it hilarious. It took a couple of weeks and someone bleeding for him to realise he shouldn't do it.
11wanda11 6
you guys have never had kids have you, two year old are testing thier boundries everyday. they can be right shitheads. you've heard of the terrible 2s....
ydi_4_suking 20
I hope the dog pees on your kid
nomnom_muffins 0
19, 20 - Actually, if you don't happen to be a shitty parent, kids will listen. it's called spanking. if you don't give your child any discipline, of course he won't listen. if you can't handle training your child to not be a little bitch, than you don't even deserve to have sex, protected or not.
IHeartJimi02 0
I just don't understand why this would happen.
unfortunate_13 5
my mother has a nursery at our home, so i've been in the situation of raising kids all my life. and seriously, it takes some effort, but it's really not that hard to teach kids what they can or can't do. you just have to be consistent and show them who's the boss. i know that 2year olds test their boundaries, but you have to punish them if they do things that are not allowed, even if that breaks your heart. if not, they'll just laugh at you, which this kid is obviously doing.
ohthebloodygore 16
26, thank you for the comment. I didn't have sex to have my child for starters. Secondly, maybe OP did spank her child, yet he continues to do it. I spank my child at times when he continues to do something he doesn't, it doesn't always work. At times sitting down and explaining to him is better. Sometimes neither work. I try to refrain from doing so simply because he's autistic. Sometimes neither explaining nor hitting works. True OP probably sounds like a bad parent, but for all we know she could have spanked and explained and yet he continues to do it. 29, I agree completely with your whole comment, but two days isn't enough. The first time OP probably laughed it off and saw nothing wrong with it. The second she probably scolded him. Maybe he'll stop after this time, but seeing as how OP is afraid it's going to become a daily routine I'm going to say she didn't scold him, thus making her a bad parent. I only said what I said because what if OP did scold and spank yet her son continues? Some kids are just like that. It takes awhile to get through to them. Some are easier than others. You can't exactly just say BAD PARENT because the son is doing something wrong.