Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try “things” while under the influence. I suggested he go down on me; he thought about it for a second and then said, “I would, but I don’t want to get scared when I take a look.” FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML
Today, as my boyfriend was about to go down on me, he held his breath and said, "I'm going in!" FML
Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around in his car. I then decided I was going to give him a blowjob for the first time. As I was going down, he grabbed my chin and said, "Don't do that, your mouth isn't clean enough." FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend told me he thought of new positions for us to try in bed because it was getting boring. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my boyfriend stuck his finger in my butt and I liked it, but I can’t ever tell him that or he’ll get that smug look on his face like, “I told you so, let’s have anal now.” FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. I started to moan right when I was about to climax. He got worried, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend convinced me to "dirty talk" with him. I'd never done it before, so I figured I would give it a go. I ended up getting so excited that I had an anxiety attack. FML
Today, my boyfriend went down on me with whiskey in his mouth. It felt like my genitals were on fire. FML
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Top comments
Yudith 28
Just tie a scarf over his eyes, then, Problem solved.
SirEnigM0nk 22
This gives new meaning to DUI (Diving Under the Influence).
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 32
That can be a scary neighborhood! And if he goes there once, you'll be pissed if he doesn't go back.
Yudith 28
Just tie a scarf over his eyes, then, Problem solved.
SirEnigM0nk 22
This gives new meaning to DUI (Diving Under the Influence).
RichardPencil 32
Just as I feared: the comments here are Bush League!
SirEnigM0nk 22
Meh, it's been a long week. I guess it blows unlike OP.
Brightside86 31
Is the influence acid? If so, a bad trip while going down on someone sounds pretty damn scary.